123. Also, besides
these teachings of God in his Word, the Lord made use of two things to confirm
me in these things; the one was the errors of the Quakers, and the other was
the guilt of sin; for as the Quakers did oppose his truth, so God did the more
confirm me in it, by leading me into the scriptures that did wonderfully
maintain it.
124. 'The errors that
these people then maintained were 1. That the holy Scriptures were not the Word
of God. 2. That every man in the world had the spirit of Christ, grace, and faith,
&c. 3. That Christ Jesus, as crucified, and dying 1600 years ago, did not
satisfy divine justice for the sins of the people. 4. That Christ's flesh and
blood were within the saints. 5. That the bodies of the good and bad that are
buried in the churchyard shall not arise again. 6. That the resurrection is
past with good men already. 7. That that man Jesus, that was crucified between
two thieves on Mount Calvary, in the land of Canaan, by Jerusalem, was not
ascended up above the starry heavens. 8. That he should not, even the same
Jesus that died by the hands of the Jews, come again at the last day, and as
man judge all nations, &c.'
125. 'Many more vile
and abominable things were in those days fomented by them, by which I was
driven to a more narrow search of the Scriptures, and was, through their light
and testimony, not only enlightened, but greatly confirmed and comforted in the
truth'; and, as I said, the guilt of sin did help me much, for still as that
would come upon me, the blood of Christ did take it off again, and again, and
again, and that too, sweetly, according to the Scriptures. O, friends! cry to
God to reveal Jesus Christ unto you; there is none teacheth like him.
126. It would be too
long for me here to stay, to tell you in particular how God did set me down in
all the things of Christ, and how he did, that he might so do, lead me into his
words; yea, and also how he did open them unto me, make them shine before me, and
cause them to dwell with me, talk with me, and comfort me over and over, both
of his own beings, and the being of his Son, and Spirit, and Word, and gospel.
127. Only this, as I
said before I will say unto you again, that in general, he was pleased to take
this course with me; first, to suffer me to be afflicted with temptation
concerning them, and then reveal them to me: as sometimes I should lie under
great guilt for sin, even crushed to the ground therewith, and then the Lord
would show me the death of Christ; yea, and so sprinkled my conscience with his
blood, that I should find, and that before I was aware, that in that conscience
where but just now did reign and rage the law, even there would rest and abide
the peace and love of God through Christ.
128. Now had I evidence, 'as I thought, of my salvation' from heaven, with many golden seals
thereon, all hanging in my sight; now could I remember this manifestation and
the other discovery of grace, with comfort; and should often long and desire
that the last day came, that I might forever be inflamed with the sight,
and joy, and communion with him whose head was crowned with thorns, whose face
was spit on, and body is broken, and soul made an offering for my sins: for
whereas, before I lay continually trembling at the mouth of hell, now
methought I was got so far therefrom that I could not when I looked back,
scarce discern it; and, oh! thought I, that I was fourscore years old now,
that I might die quickly, that my soul might be gone to rest.
129. 'But before I had got thus far out of these my temptations, I did greatly long to see some ancient godly man's experience, who had writ some hundreds of years before I was born; for those who had writ in our days, I thought, but I desire them now to pardon me, that they had writ only that which others felt, or else had, through the strength of their wits and parts, studied to answer such objections as they perceived others were perplexed with, without going down themselves into the deep. Well, after many such longings in my mind, the God in whose hands are all our days and ways, did cast into my hand, one day, a book of Martin Luther; it was his comment on the Galatians—it also was so old that it was ready to fall piece from piece if I did but turn it over. Now I was pleased much that such an old book had fallen into my hands; the which, when I had but a little way perused, I found my condition, in his experience, so largely and profoundly handled, as if his book had been written out of my heart. This made me marvel; for thus thought I, This man could not know anything of the state of Christians now but must need to write and speak the experience of former days.'
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