The Missionary Watching by Oswald Chambers

I was reading Oswald Chambers Devotion book today and I truly enjoyed it. Sadly, after 7 years of calling myself a Christian, I was amongst those Oswald referred to as the early stage of Christianity. Until God took me into the wilderness, He opened my spiritual eyes to see further upon my acceptance of the path He forged for me. Until then, my love for Him and my Christian life was at the same level of the limit of my natural capacity. If you are reading this and you understand the difference in a practical way, between the limit of your own natural capacity and the true supernatural Christian life we have in Christ, then I know you have joy mix with gratitude in your heart for having been led by Him to a supernatural life in Him.  

The disciples felt asleep in Mathew 26:36-41 simply because,  while they loved Christ, they could not identify with the supernatural life, supernatural training and the  pain that takes us from the place where they could identify with Him. A place where you truly live in the soul what it means to identify with Him in a supernatural way. One of the beauties of the Christian life is that we can live the daily Christian paradox where the supernatural life  becomes the natural life to us. When we learn to live in Christ and Christ lives His life in us and through us daily, before we know it, His supernatural life becomes totally natural to us. 

I was pleasantly surprised to see that all those things that my church rejected me for, did not matter one bit to God. All those things that I learned to view others through, such as morality vs immorality and the dos and donts list we hang onto so hard within the Church, God could care less. Through the dos and donts list, I used to see myself as a spiritually messy person and my pastor was a saint. My spirituality was anchored in morality, degradation, uprightness and so on. That is what I knew and what I was being taught. At first, I gave the Spirit a hard time and felt that I should hold onto what I knew and appreciated about my Christianity. Through God’s grace and constrained I continued the path and I found out, unless we learn first to identify with Him through practical experiences of this life we do not understand our identification in Christ. Sadly, we do not even know that we do not understand. How can we when all we know is the natural life?

 While all these things I was taught to practice through my Church were good, but as God opened my eyes, I could see that we tend to put the cart before the horses. Hence why the self has to go first, to make room for Himself in us. When room has been made for Him to take over our lives as our Lord not just our savior, then we find the pieces fall into place naturally as He deals with imparted righteousness in our lives. It was somewhat funny when I realized that He was not dismissing our degrading state, uprightness, immorality and what have you. He was dealing with things in the proper manner “HIS WAY.”

I will leave you with a link of today’s devotion

When You Are Hemmed In On Every Sides By Life Circumstances!

You know, my life seems to be an endless invitation for hardships to come and surround me. For some reasons I am constantly facing hopeless circumstances. Often I feel like I am hemmed in by God on all sides.  I guarantee you that I do not go out of my ways to get in trouble with God. If I want to be honest with all of you, I would have to confess that sometimes I ask myself if Christianity is all in my imagination because my heart, common sense, and wisdom cannot comprehend how is it, a God that is called a “God of love” would allow so much to come into one’s life and for so long. So, the only logical conclusion is “the whole Christianity thing is a hoax”

But, I thank my God that those moments when my strength fails to carry me through, I can find refuge and comfort in knowing:

1)                 He will carry me through

2)                 My common sense and finite understanding will never take me to the heights He has in mind for me.

3)                 Christianity is truly a sacrificial life to the highest degree.

4)                Because I am not privy to God’s higher purpose, my part in all this is to endure my lot with my mouth shut and my heart opened wide to take it in, according to His will.

5)                 Christ never misled His true followers and never promised a bed of roses down here on earth.

6)                 For all I know, my endurance of it all could be something between God and Satan, like in Job’s situation. So, not trusting Him all the way, no matter how painful and lengthy of a process I am in, could be causing God to lose face vis a vis Satan.

7)                 Through watching my painful life unfolding, I can see God’s hand on me, taking me back to the God that I know, the invisible God that I have seen with my heart and soul. He does that to reassure my soul and alleviate the pain. So, today, the Spirit told me “have you noticed how life got more difficult for Jesus?  Think about His pain to leave heaven behind! The pain of being dependent on earthly parents to care for Him as in infant! The humiliation of being obedient as a child and earthly parents! Think about what it must have been like for Him living over thirty years in obscurity amongst his brothers and sisters in His households!”

Then, the Spirit continued by saying “think about how bad and painful things got for Him when He reached the culminating point of His ministry, did things get easier? No, because every day was a test, a trial, opportunity for more shame, more persecution, less acceptance of Him and who He was in me? ‘WHY SHOULD YOUR LIFE BE DIFFERENT?’”

I also learned something else. Often times when we are going through hardships and life is tossing us like a ping pong ball, it is hard to put our hands on who to grab onto through the Bible’s heroes. If you are like me, you try to find whether Paul life would do better or Abraham, or David, or Joseph etc. But, the Spirit said to me the closer you get to me and the deeper this life in me, the more you need to let go of your role models and grab onto Christ.

Perhaps you are not like me and this is my own weakness that God has to deal with. But I knew He had put His fingers on one of my weaknesses that needed to change. This weakness of mine is that I am constantly seeking to model myself after one of those heroes of the Bible like Abraham, David, the Apostles etc. I am always trying to find out how one of them would handle the situation that I am in, so that I can walk with God. Understand that I aim to please Him. But, secretly in my heart, I am hoping that He would apply their timeline to my hardship so that I could see an end to it. I also try to convince myself why my timeline should be much less, because I am not in their league. Cultivating this kind of frame of mind causes me to always expect to be free as soon as possible, because I put in my time.

God made it clear to me that it was not up to me to hang onto those heroes and expect the outcome to turn good for me, like He did for them. i.e, everything was restored to Job, David received his crown, Joseph got his days in the sun, etc. He basically told me that it was not my business how and when He decide this awful life I have been living most of my Christian life with Him.

He taught me, as you and I grow spiritually, we reach a time where it is not enough to model after Paul or Joseph, or Abraham. The only source of hope, faith, trust and the only one who can write the ending of our circumstances, is Him and that should be sufficient for me. “LOOK ONTO ME”

This lesson happened early this morning as I woke up kind of nostalgic and with such a mood to meditate on Him before I do anything else. So, I started reading my devotion books and I was surprised to see Oswald Chamber’s devotion. I could not help smiling because I realized once again His sense of humor and His way of making provision for the hour, will always get me.

The lesson I learned today, even though my situation seems desperate and painful, and even though I need God to come to my rescue today, right now and even though He remains silent. I cannot fret.

I FEEL LIKE I AM SITTING ON THE TRAIN TRACKS, THE TRAIN IS ONLY A FEW STEPS AWAY FROM ME, AT FULL SPEED,YET GOD IS TELLING ME DON’T MOVE, TRUST ME, & DO NOT FRET!

HERE IS OSWALD CHAMBERS JULY 04 DEVOTION

Faith - Part 9

  How do we know we are actually living out true faith?

The answer is when we believe everything God said about Himself and everything He said about us. When you can believe that He is indeed everything He said He is, brings you to a place where you can make a total commitment to Him. But the challenge we all face, is getting to that state where the belief that is in the mind is transferred to the heart and into practice into the everyday life. 

A. W. Tozer said: The word “faith” is common these days, but placing one’s faith in God is a weighty action, uncommonly fraught with consequence and, by His design, inconvenience. Faith in God is reassuring and comforting only insofar as believers trust Him—and that depth of trust is the mark of a mature Christian who has allowed faith to intrude on his life and shift his gaze away from his.

  

When I was in the wilderness with God by the time I reached 2007, things have gotten so bad that for a moment I felt God was cruel.  You see, I had my own expectations and understanding and in my mind I was under the impression that God can only push things so far. Let me explain what I mean by that. While this is not biblical to think that God could push things so far, but I came to think this way, by hanging on to certain verses which I understood with the little intellect I have.  I can think of two of those verses right now.  One of them is “ I will never leave you nor forsake you” and the other one is “ for I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  In my mind I thought, for God to take everything away from me was in contradiction to so many verses in the Bible and I could not wrap my brain around it.

Between 2005 up to the beginning of 2007 God kept bringing me to places where I needed to prove to Him that I trusted Him Even though the uncertainty was insurmountable and I could not see where anything was leading, I kept saying yes to God and chose Him over and over again thinking it would be sufficient. (After all, He did not let Abraham sacrifice Isaac)  I had no idea what God was doing, was simply preparing me for the worst that was yet to come.

In my mind, I kept thinking there is no way God would take me deeper because my life would be catastrophic so the alternative was unthinkable.  But, if you follow my thoughts so far, you will notice all throughout my hardship, I was looking at me, my pain, my failure and my losses. Yet, even though I was wrong all the way and Salvation was still about me, I had no idea I was failing Him miserably. I honestly felt that I proved myself to God when it came to my faith in Him and as far as I was concerned He should have been satisfied. After all, when it truly mattered and He put me to the test, I chose Him.

To make a long story short, when time was of the essence and I needed God to come to my rescue and end the waiting process, He told me it was time to come to terms with the worst case scenario. Then He showed me His worst case scenario would be me being homeless on the streets and alone. Well, I answered Him by lashing out to Him and I told Him He did not honor His word. After I hashed it out with God, I learned to trust Him and that He had a plan for me even if I could not understand the reason behind it all, it was not my place to doubt Him.  Even though I was scared, confused and in pain because the life that I knew was disintegrating before my eyes and I could not do anything to salvage it, I actually accepted my fate.  With uncontrollable tears and intense pain I went to Him and said “May your will be done regardless what I expect or desire.” When I finished, I asked Him to watch over me and I would appreciate it if He could show me which street is better. I prayed that He would sustain me through the pain, all the losses and the shame.

Later on, God showed when I accepted the worst case scenario that was the moment I showed true faith in Him.  He showed me the difference between the first few months when I chose Him but I made the outcome and everything else about what He was putting me through, about me. Even though I was still a babe in the faith, I found there was a world of a difference in my heart.  There was humility in my heart, I had a heart focussed more on living upon Him, I was persuaded of His right to my life and I surrendered to the truth of the word of God.

Amazingly, as soon as I made the decision to trust Him, He showed me how us Christians misunderstand and misused verses of the Bible most of the time because we understand them with our intellect. I also stopped thinking that God owed me anything. He also taught me why most Christians do not have faith but they are not aware of it. It was something out of this world how He opened up my heart to learn spiritual truths. But most of what He taught me during that time was about the state of Christianity out there and why I needed to be set apart.

Well, since He was so happy with me and He was teaching me so much, I again assumed that He was not going to go through with His plan for me to be out there on the streets.  Not only I was wrong, He did go through the worst case scenario with me.  Furthermore, I found out soon after, the loss of everything and being homeless was just the beginning of what was going to become my life.

When I first lost everything there was nothing left except perhaps my life for Him to take, I did not even have time to mourn my losses because God was busy putting me through the brokenness process, then it was a time of regeneration, the next that followed was declaring me holy. It all happened in that order. During that time, I was so shattered into millions of pieces on the inside I felt like a shadow of myself.  At times I wish I could get an epidural to endure the pain of the impartation process. There were times, I wish I could sleep while God did the work in me. But, this is not how God works. I am now in my eighth years and the waiting process is still in full fledge.

All this happened because I felt called by Him to draw closer. When I obeyed the call, I had no idea this was going to be a life long of testing faith.

The rest of this story is for another post.

Faith – Part 8

Hebrews 6:11-12 “We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, so that what you hope for may be fully realized.  We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.”

Our faith in the crucified and ascended Christ has to be demonstrated in the way we live out our Christianity and without putting our faith into practice, well, we have NOTHING. It does not matter how good we feel about what we think we have, because if there is no faith, there is no substance, no God, no heaven and no nothing.  Yet, faith is not something that we conjure up out of the blue. It is not like living out some disjointed notion about God as we go on our merry way doing what feels right. If we take the Israelites in the wilderness for a moment we can vividly see that they never understood what faith meant and they never understood how important it was to apply it in their daily walk either. They were not in the mood to learn and they were too busy thinking about what’s in it for them. In their case, the need to possess the land of Canaan was all they could think of while they rejected the giver.

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I am not saying that about the Israelites because I want to criticize them, it is there in black and white in the Bible for us to see that at any moment in our lives we could be like one of them. In fact, I had someone else’s in mind to give you as an example for this post, until I was caught in the same dilemma up until two days ago. I was lying down in bed while in pain with a cold that does not want to let go and I got to thinking about my life. Would you believe while I was in that frame of mind, all that I could see was how lousy my life is and how God is putting me through unnecessary hoops. All of the sudden I felt like a combination of job when he was lamenting and I also was in a winning mood like the Israelites in the wilderness. I had so much pain within because I felt God could be a little bit more merciful since I passed all the numerous trials He put me through. Then all of the sudden I realized as I was in bed crying because I felt so bad for myself, that my thoughts toward God were not at all flattering.

I stopped myself right there. Yes I was still in pain and I felt the only way I could feel better about myself is if I could bash God and let Him have it. But, I also knew within me, that's going onto a slippery slope extremely dangerous and I am opening a door to Satan that I might not be able to close behind me so easily. So, I grabbed onto all the strength that I could muster to stop and think about God’s word.  Honestly, even though I stopped myself from being bashful and critical about God, but, I was not in the mood to hear those verses about how good and faithful He is. These things are knowledge that I possessed already and they are part of my very fibber that makes me who I am in Him which is a holy child of God living a life of intimacy and love with Him.

When I was living this deplorable moment, I was not LIVING in the Spirit. When we allow ourselves to live in the flesh for a moment, it can be devastating and unlike David who gave in, to the point where he murdered Uriah the Hittite in an effort to cover up his sin we have to take a page from his book and stop when we realize what we are about to do. Don’t give into it, and do not even bother to continue your train of thoughts. In David’s case the minute he kept looking at Bathsheba bathing from his balcony he opened the door for Satan to enter.

It is strange to describe myself as a loving child of God, yet having a mind capable of thinking the worse thoughts about Him. That is because in our nature, there is nothing good in us. I knew I had to leave this mindset behind me and go back to what I knew of His word found in Job chapter 38 and 39. When you look at these two chapters you can summarize it in few words, God basically said to Job those seven words “who the heck you think you are?” Remember how much He bragged about Job and what kind of man he was (Job 1: 8. If you play close attention to this verse you will also see that God directed Satan’s heart onto Job. This shows you that no matter how far we travel with God, we cannot escape Satan in tempting us to get us in the gutter with Him.

As I thought about those words God said to Job in chapters 38 & 39, I was put in my place and learned again that it is not my place to question God’s way. If He feels the needs to put ten thousand obstacles in my path and frustrate every plan that I have, while putting only 10 obstacles in any other Christian’s path instead of thousands like me, then it must be the right thing for His own purpose. Believe me when I tell you that I felt awful toward God afterwards, just for knowing that I can hurt Him in this manner.

The writer of Hebrews tells us we cannot afford to become lazy and we have to show diligence. What do you think that is? Because first of all we are on a journey and God arranged it in a way that we can only live this life of faith as long as we hang onto Him and recognize that apart from Him we can do nothing. He wants us to learn to live a life dependent completely on Him so that we can find the strength and grace needed to continue the journey. What I shared with you above, about my sin is something that could happen to anyone of us, especially when you are living a life of one distress after another and you have no idea when enough is enough for God.

I am able to continue what seems like a God forsaken life, because I learned to live and walk in the Spirit instead of walking after the flesh. I rest the whole weight of my life and situation on Him. I can do that, not because I am gullible or because of some vague idea of faith I muster on my own. I know He is real, I know His promises are true and His word calls for an obedience to trust and obey that equate to faith.  His word says that the just shall live by faith and faith is always tested by God. While there is pain in watching the residue of my life now, I know I cannot shrink back. I keep going because His word expects me to submit to His will for me through any kind of difficulties and however long He chooses the difficulties should last.

I shared my experience with you because I share the good and the bad. Secondly, God showed me something today. Times like the one I experienced two days ago, instead of dealing with my pain, I would have gone to my ungodly friend and take a break from God for a few hours, but this time I did not have the luxury. I also shared because what happened to me and the way I dealt with it to avoid backsliding even for a few days is also an example of what God calls endurance through faith exercised as I made use of my daily portion of grace in Him.

The Christian life is a life where we have to continue believing till the end. John 3:36 did not say He who BEILEVED in past tense. It is rather whoever believes and continues to believe day in day out.

John 3:36 “Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God’s wrath remains on them.”

If you are going through a time where you are not sure what is going on in your Christian walk,  inside you feel empty, sad, overwhelmed and depressed; all of the sudden the Christianity you thought you knew, the Christianity that brought you so much joy is far out of reach. You feel like you are on some kind of automatic pilot. Even faking a smile is hard for you. Then you are going through what Oswald called the discipline of dismay. The discipline of dismay lasts a little while. It is a dark period of your life that your soul needs to go through if your Christianity is to amount to anything to God.

Like Oswald said, we tend to look back on our time of obedience and our past sacrifices to God in an effort to keep our enthusiasm for him strong (see Isaiah 50:10-11) One of the mistake we make is to try and find the enthusiasm back. We do not realize that God is not looking for that enthusiasm, He in fact does not care for it. He wants you to endure the inexplicable pain that you are in right now, while seeking His face and focus on Him like there is no tomorrow.

What Oswald did not know when he wrote that piece is that we are in a time where when the enthusiasm for God is gone, the younger generation falls back on Social Media to seek encouragement.  So they find comfort through those shallow comments these professed Christians have perfected over the years, but with no real meaning to their lives. I noticed as well the younger generation lack guidance and understanding coming from their own family. If they had parents living deeper Christian lives with Him, parents who have gone through the process with God, those younger people would have a better understanding of what is going on and would stop in seeking for the type of band-aid comfort they find on Social Media. 

What we do not realize, when God takes us through a time of dismay, it is indeed a good thing for our soul and our walk with Him. While we are there, it does not seem it is possible that any good can come of it because there is so much confusion just trying to understand why we are where we are with Him. But, it is good because God is taking you beyond a time where you can bypass the sense of self-satisfaction you get from your Bible reading, prayer time, and Christian activities. He is taking you deeper into Him. The sad thing is, until God takes you there, you would never realize that you have been living a self-satisfying kind of Christian life.

This phase is mandatory, the waiting process, His silence, the fact that you do not recognize Him and He is becoming more and more like a stranger to you. The protest that you will go through, the soul searching, the lack of answers from Him, are all part of the process. The attitude He is looking for is for you to surrender it all to Him, for you to stop protesting, for you to trust those words you have been reading in the Bible and trust that He is a faithful God. When you go through it with the right attitude, you position yourself to receive more of His grace.

It is a time of great depression and no matter what you do, your soul cannot get out of it. Don’t despair, and don’t panic. If you surrender through the process, I promise you, He will take care of you in the same way He took care of Elijah when he was running for his life and God sent an Angel to feed Him and care for him.  He will take care of you in the same way He took care of Paul who was so discouraged that nothing could revive his soul, God had to send an angel on three occasions to reassure him and strengthen him.

So, if you are going to a dark time with Him, I beg of you, stop seeking for temporary shallow satisfaction. It is a time to hang on to Him more than ever. It is the perfect time to test Hebrews 13:5 “I will never desert you nor forsake you.”  Trust in the God of your Salvation. Look to His Cross. It is hard to let go of all we know and to hang on to Him especially at a time where we have no answer and He seems more absent than we have ever experienced. But it is okay. It will feel as if you are asked to let go of something that is holding you nicely and help you stand up, for something you have no idea what it is, where it is, what it is made of. In fact within yourself, you have no desire of letting go of something you can see for something you cannot see. But, your soul needs to go through it all. Your soul needs to learn to trust what it cannot see

  

That’s exactly what He wants from you. Even though nothing makes sense to you, I beg of you to trust Him and He will not fail you.

In essence, what you are doing during this period, is giving up your identity to take on His!

Here is Oswald Chambers's devotion for today

The Discipline of Dismay

03

15

2013

As they followed they were afraid —Mark 10:32

At the beginning of our life with Jesus Christ, we were sure we knew all there was to know about following Him. It was a delight to forsake everything else and to throw ourselves before Him in a fearless statement of love. But now we are not quite so sure. Jesus is far ahead of us and is beginning to seem different and unfamiliar— “Jesus was going before them; and they were amazed” (Mark 10:32).

There is an aspect of Jesus that chills even a disciple’s heart to its depth and makes his entire spiritual life gasp for air. This unusual Person with His face set “like a flint” (Isaiah 50:7) is walking with great determination ahead of me, and He strikes terror right through me. He no longer seems to be my Counselor and Friend and has a point of view about which I know nothing. All I can do is stand and stare at Him in amazement. At first I was confident that I understood Him, but now I am not so sure. I begin to realize that there is a distance between Jesus and me and I can no longer be intimate with Him. I have no idea where He is going, and the goal has become strangely distant.

Jesus Christ had to understand fully every sin and sorrow that human beings could experience, and that is what makes Him seem unfamiliar. When we see this aspect of Him, we realize we really don’t know Him. We don’t recognize even one characteristic of His life, and we don’t know how to begin to follow Him. He is far ahead of us, a Leader who seems totally unfamiliar, and we have no friendship with Him.

The discipline of dismay is an essential lesson which a disciple must learn. The danger is that we tend to look back on our times of obedience and on our past sacrifices to God in an effort to keep our enthusiasm for Him strong (see Isaiah 1:10-11). But when the darkness of dismay comes, endure until it is over, because out of it will come the ability to follow Jesus truly, which brings inexpressibly wonderful joy

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The Discipline of Spiritual Perseverance - Part 2

Something Oswald said in his February 22 devotion that brought it all back so vividly, prompted me to wonder if God taught him in the same way too. “But one of the greatest stresses in life is the stress of waiting for God. He brings fulfillment, “because you have kept My command to persevere . . .” (Revelation 3:10).Continue to persevere spiritually.”

To me, it was strange to see how Oswald just ended with Revelation 3:10 at the end. In going through my trials to learn spiritual perseverance and endurance, the Holy Spirit kept reminding me of revelation 3:10. It was like the goal of this season of my hardships was to teach me how to get there. It was strange to see that my life was falling apart, I was experiencing loss that I could never recover from, the waiting, the uncertainty, and the pain of it all that were ravaging my soul, yet none of it was as big as the outcome that was revelation 3:10. Every time it was too hard for me to continue, my mind started fidgeting, the Holy Spirit would bring to mind this verse. Instantly and every single time my reaction to the remembrance was like a fussing baby getting his pacifier.   

As I watched myself now and how I am equipped to endure the challenges of my daily Christians life, I knew all I went through was worth it to get there. If you ask me if I would go through it over again, my answer to you would be no and no.  But was it worth it knowing what I know now? Then yes it was worth every moment.  

God does not make such a drastic statement in Revelation 3:10 without equipping us for the journey. As I was going through my spiritual preparation to learn perseverance and endurance, I also knew this was one more verse in the Bible that we Christians misunderstand terribly. While the true possessors of the faith need not to worry about this verse, but anyone else in the Church who simply professed to be Christians are included in that lump.  As professed Christians, we cannot make out that He would impose such conditions on us. 

So, when our explanations and our own false beliefs cannot quite explain why certain verses are in the Bible, we tend to ignore them, minimize them and eventually we put them all in the back of our mind and act as if they do not matter. But, it is precisely because we feel the need to act in this manner towards God’s Word we should worry about who we are in Him. God will not forget. In this same Bible that some of us insist that our explanation suffice, He did say in Matthew 24:35 “Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away”. This strong verse is as valid for the unbelievers as it is for the believers.

When you feel there are verses in the Bible that do not work well with your idea of Salvation, do not question the verses or God.  You should not ignore those verses either. If you were not blinded by ignorance, pride and disobedience, you would understand these verses are there to differentiate the real things from the impostors. God will use His own Word to show you why you did not make the cut like He did to rebuke Satan in the wilderness. So, a rule of thumb should be to question your understanding and release yourself in the hands of God with an open heart and mind to help you put the pieces together. If you insist on redefining the word to suit your explanations, you might find out it was a foolish attitude when it is too late.

The reason that He can make such statement like Revelation 3:10 is because He knows He who began a good work in us will see it to completion. What He asks of us, He always equips us through grace. Learning to endure is the mark of the true child of God. As you learn to endure you also learn to live the faithful and the abiding life.

Stop repeating history over and over again. Adam & Eve got too comfortable, took God for granted and disobeyed, what was the result? Did they expect it? No - The Israelites did the same thing too when they were in the wilderness, did they see God promises? No. Cultivate the habit of not readjusting God but yourself. Do not be too rigid in your false beliefs. Satan has trained some of us so well, that we see him where he has nothing to do with our situation but only our stubborn and prideful self. Yet, places where we should see him, we don’t. When we cultivate this kind of attitude where we readjust God’s word instead of ourselves, Satan does not even bother to assign more demons to you because there is no threat of losing you. He knows your pride and harden heart will get you there on your own.

Never mind how long you have been roaming in the Church. Never mind your status there. Do not get caught up in your own hypes. Do not get too comfortable with your Christianity. Take the habit of examining yourself. Ask yourself what has Christianity brought into your life beside traditions, rituals, feeling good about myself, and repetitions? Then find out what it means to be the reverse of a steadfast Christian. Ask yourself what has changes in you inwardly?  Even if you do not experience God and even if it takes time to get there, but after twenty, thirty years and more, you should be aware that inside of you, you are made of a different fibre by now.

Just in case you wonder why it is important to God to make perseverance and endurance such an important part of the Christian life and why He wants nothing to do with idleness and laziness you should check out this. One search in the thesaurus for the word perseverance brought the definition “constancy” and the synonym of the word constancy is:

abidingness, adherence, allegiance, ardor, attachment, certainty, decision, dependability, determination, devotedness, devotion, doggedness, eagerness, earnestness, endurance,faith, fealty, fidelity, firmness, honesty, honor, integrity, love, loyalty, permanence, perseverance, principle, regularity, resolution, stability, staunchness, steadfastness, steadiness, surety, tenacity, trustiness, trustworthiness, truthfulness, unchangeableness, unfailingness, uniformity, zeal

The opposite of someone who persevere is: 

apathy, idleness, indolence, laziness, lethargy

John Maxwell said:  “A difficult time can be more readily endured if we retain the conviction that our existence holds a purpose – a cause to pursue, a person to love, a goal to achieve.”

Are you going through a hard time right now? Know that when you are in a position where you are experiencing hardships, whether you brought it on yourself through unwise Choices, or it is brought on by God is not really the point. Go through it with Him in mind and purposely live for Him. Do not try to surround yourself with people and things just to keep your mind busy. Make Him the center of your life. Give Him your undivided attention. Persevere through it all with Him in mind then you will find all that Maxwell mentioned in the quote above, by grace has become yours. Through His grace you will find those words that make up the synonym of the word “constancy” have become part of the fibre of who you are within. 

This morning as I was reading Oswald Chambers devotion, it dawned on me that something that happened to me so many years ago was right there in the Bible, yet, I had no idea it was written in one of the books that I love so much, the Romans.

When I first entered the wilderness with Him, He gave me two solemn warnings. One was that voice I heard when I was by myself in the house. The voice was loud and so clear that I did not move for a few seconds. All I heard was “nothing in this life is about you” This was the first and the last time I heard His voice that way. I also understand later on, He spoke to me that way because I have not acquired the discipline of hearing Him in my heart yet.

Through the message, I knew “hard time” was coming but I was not prepared for what was ahead for me and I am glad I did not know the full scope. Right after this message, I was put through a rigorous training of hearing the Holy Spirit speaking to my heart. During that period one thing He made clear to me was that not only my life was never to be about me, but as we move forward, anything that will happen to me during this period I was in, had nothing to do with me. I did not say a word; I listened and remained silent the whole time. It is funny how both of us all of the sudden were silent. But my silence was not the same as God’s because though He was no longer talking, He was for lack of a better word, infusing in me what He meant by “this period of my life had nothing to do with me”

It was one of the most beautiful experiences that He let me keep with me even now. I knew that everything about that particular season of my life was about God and other people that He would put in my path. I knew, rejecting the season or wasting it away, meant forfeiting God’s plan for me. What was amazing in my experiencing this with Him was the fact that I could see myself as being just a tool. I could see from the moment I was conceived in my mother’s womb that was God’s purpose all along. There were a whole bunch of people in the shadow, all faceless, I could see they came from all shapes, height, sex, and sizes. While it appeared they were all strangers, yet they were holding hands. They were also waiting there, as if they were waiting for me to make my move or say something.  All I got from this encounter was that I was born to touch their lives in whatever capacity He decided.

This encounter also helped me in such a deep way to walk the steadfast life. I knew, my going through the season, was simply part of the process. It was amazing to see something so personal and so intimate could make me feel so much like I do not matter. Let me explain. It was very important for God to make me feel like I was something like a hammer that was fashioned for the purpose of being used just like a hammer would be. I carried this understanding and feeling within my heart to see me through the darkest days of my wilderness, even when things were unbearable to my soul. I was aware, if I did not let Him have His ways, then how could I live with myself knowing I failed these people? I failed God? I failed the reason I was born for? 

I wish I could make you see with your spiritual eyes the impact of knowing that even when you were nothing yet, your father or grandfather were not even born. Yet, God put a plan forward with you in mind. Can you grasp the magnitude of the God that we serve? Can you see how important you are? It is never about the big thing you can do. The sensation and the importance, but it is about being His instrument as you live the life you were born for. Through this experience I could see when we all die and Christ is putting all things the way they should, people that I honor now, might end up being last. I beg you to see with your heart what I am saying it is who you are “IN HIS HANDS” that matters.

                 

To me, it was not a question that God could change His plan and use someone else or do it Himself. It was instilled in me that was my responsibility. I felt, if I fail, then my life was worthless. From this single experience I learned so much that I could write a book about it. But, the funny thing is, all I learned no matter how I look at it, all I can see is God’s sovereignty which has been magnified in my life more than I could find words to explain myself. I enjoyed learning a tiny bit about the intricacies of His plan for us and how each one of us has a responsibility and how important it is to live out His plan for us.

I could see through the experience with Him, how when you touch someone’s life according to His will in your own life, the gift keeps on giving even after one hundred years or two thousand years down the road. I know my writings do not cajole people and make them feel good in their lethargy. If I were to do that to get more readers, or to be liked, I would not be true to the reason of my being on this earth. I would not be true to Him who made me. I also know God has a plan and my writings will find those I am writing for. BLESSED BE HIS NAME! These people are singled out by God Himself.

I am the first one amazed at God’s power when I learn from books written 3, 4 or 7 hundred years ago. While these people are long gone that even their bones no longer there, but, because they live God’s purpose for their lives, they are still teaching me. They are allowing me to go deeper and deeper in Him. What is more amazing is that when I read those classic and those puritan books and sermons, I know God had me personally in mind. He knew this person writing was going to make an impact on me for His Glory. What an amazing life we have waiting for us? What a magnificent God we serve? I hate the fact that there is not enough room in my heart to love Him the way He deserves. I hate most that I keep failing Him over and over again in this life, when in reality He deserves my all, unconditionally.  

This is why, as long as I live, and as long as it is His will for me, I will always write against physical selfishness, mental carelessness, moral insensitivity, or spiritual weakness, and our lethargy because the Christian life is too hard. Whether we like it or not, it makes a difference to God because His Word told us in Revelation 2:7 “…..To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God”  At the right time, He will separate those who profess to be Christians and those who possess the Christian faith and we are dead wrong if we think all we will be losing is just some reward.

I know I have a long way to go. So, am I perfect at it? This is a big NO and thousands times NO, but I am truly a work in progress in His hands of love.  Every day comes with its own challenges and sometimes the learning curve is so steep I want to rest. (This rest here means when you go back to your old self to find your comfort zone) But I also know that I can do all things through Him who strengthens me, so I keep going forward toward the goal, apprehending what He apprehended me for.

Are you living out God’s purpose for your life? Are you your brother’s keeper? I beg you not to take things lightly! 

This should have been split in two post. I apologize. But, I will leave you with Oswald Chambers devotion for today. Read it if you have time or come back to it when you can.

“Am I My Brother’s Keeper?”

02

15

2013

None of us lives to himself . . . —Romans 14:7

Has it ever dawned on you that you are responsible spiritually to God for other people? For instance, if I allow any turning away from God in my private life, everyone around me suffers. We “sit together in the heavenly places . . .” (Ephesians 2:6). “If one member suffers, all the members suffer with it . . .” (1 Corinthians 12:26). If you allow physical selfishness, mental carelessness, moral insensitivity, or spiritual weakness, everyone in contact with you will suffer. But you ask, “Who is sufficient to be able to live up to such a lofty standard?” “Our sufficiency is from God . . .” and God alone (2 Corinthians 3:5).

“You shall be witnesses to Me . . .” (Acts 1:8). How many of us are willing to spend every bit of our nervous, mental, moral, and spiritual energy for Jesus Christ? That is what God means when He uses the word witness. But it takes time, so be patient with yourself. Why has God left us on the earth? Is it simply to be saved and sanctified? No, it is to be at work in service to Him. Am I willing to be broken bread and poured-out wine for Him? Am I willing to be of no value to this age or this life except for one purpose and one alone— to be used to disciple men and women to the Lord Jesus Christ. My life of service to God is the way I say “thank you” to Him for His inexpressibly wonderful salvation. Remember, it is quite possible for God to set any of us aside if we refuse to be of service to Him— “. . . lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified” (1 Corinthians 9:27).

Courtesy of: http://utmost.org/