The Overshadowing of God’s Personal Deliverance - Oswald Chambers

In 2005 when I first lost my job, I had a plan. I had accumulated proof that I was being harassed by my bosses, abused verbally and mentally, especially when they thought I had no witnesses and we were behind closed doors. I had accumulated so much proof that when I lost my job, even though I could sense God had a plan for me, I thought while God works on His plan for my life, I would take these people to court and make them pay for everything I had suffered. I truly felt that I had the right to do so.

Right after I lost my job, I felt the need to be around people and the environment that I was in, I was encouraged to get my lawsuit going. A few days later, God worked something out in my heart to a point I could not ignore His still voice. I had to go somewhere to be alone with Him, a place where the environment was not so conducive to Satan’s influence. The minute I was alone, I could feel the quietness in my heart, and I was in a different frame of mind. That same day, I received a phone call from my brother who is a very successful homebuilder and has his own company. He wanted me to come down to Montreal and join. Of course, the potential for what I could earn through wheeling and dealing, bribing and what have you, were all put in front of me to consider.

That was a weird phone call when you consider that my brother never called me for years and he always treated me as if I was beneath him, based on the stark contrast in our status.  We were not and still not travelling the same circle. I have to say that I was tempted and was considering the offer. Through the phone conversation, the Holy Spirit said, “this opportunity is not godly and it is Satan talking through your brother.” All of the sudden He made me hear another voice behind my brother’s voice on the phone line. I still cringe when I think about it. I could identify the other voice, I still remember vividly all I wanted to do was to get rid of my brother on the phone and I told him I will call him back. I never did.  I give you this background so you can see how Satan can use other people to tempt us and derail God’s work. But, when we have the inclination to follow, we have nothing to fear because He is bigger than Satan and has already defeated him. 

Right after that, God spoke to my heart and discouraged me from suing the bank. I still remember vividly when the Holy Spirit said to me “the time that you will spend suing is a time where you could be with me learning and growing spiritually.” While the Spirit was telling me that, He gave me a vision where I would could see how I was going to be swimming through paper works in court, with no time for Him. Most of all, I would be in a perpetual mind frame where I was going to be consumed with the injustice that was done to me. Strangely, in the vision I could see how my demeanor and all my mind were absorbed by self-pity, totally devoted to the case at hand.

It was a little bit painful for me to say yes to God because this meant that I did not know what the next step was and God was going to have to decide the agenda. Somehow, I knew my saying yes to God meant that I was taking on His agenda for my life, it's that simple.  So, I agreed with God anyway. I will spare you the details as to how happy He was that I chose to follow in this way. However, I want to point out that my attitude was of one, living a disjointed life. A life so compartmentalized that I felt the need to live out my plans for my life in conjunction with God’s plans.  But, in my defense, I did not know better, I was never taught there was something better either. To me, living a compartmentalized Christianity was all natural.  I was surprised today when I read Oswald Chambers devotion for June 27. I could see, God had the same concerns about me then.

Oswald said: “If we are devoted to Jesus Christ, we have nothing to do with what we encounter, whether it is just or unjust.” One of the blessings that God bestowed on me when I chose His plan for my life instead of going on with the lawsuit, was to show me in a vision how the injustice that happened to me all these years had nothing to do with me. In the vision it was as if I was totally removed from all this and the injustice was actually done to Christ in me, but not me. At the same time, it was all part of God’s design to get me to where He wants me so that He could use me as a holy vessel.

What was strange in the vision was the fact that I felt I was just a bystander in all that happened to me as a human being. The focus was removed from me being this human being who deserves to be treated better and deserves to be compensated, to Christ wanting to use this vessel that I am and permitted all these things to happen for His own purpose and glory.  I wish I could find words to convey what I lived out in that vision to make it simpler. But, the reality is that when the bad things in life are happening to us, we have to learn to remove ourselves from the equation. Even though it is a very hard thing to do through the pain, the insults, the hardships, the humiliation, the indignation, the self-pity we are tempted to indulge ourselves in just for a little while, the distress and the heartache of all of it. We have to learn to see God’s plan at work and learn to wait for Him to divulge more while we keep walking steadily before Him.

It is almost like Job’s story. None of what happened to Job had anything to do with Job. He was just a by product of something between God and Satan. God used Job to make a point to Satan and proved to Satan that He has people who actually love Him faithfully out there. He also used the situation to glorify Himself. At the same time, God had a plan in mind for Job, He wanted to teach Job more of Him.

When we put God’s purpose and plan for our lives first, there is always something in it for us. By, the way, this is how God wants us to claim His promises in the Bible. Even though God intends to reward us when we see Him in heaven, for living in His purpose and plans, but, He always rewards us as a token of affection for now. Like a deposit for what’s to come. In the case of Job, we see how everything wrapped up neatly for Job in one sentence. All the 41 chapters of the book is culminated neatly with Job 42:6 when Job said to God, “My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes.”

Job came out of it all and felt he was the richest man on earth even before God restored his wealth and life. The treasure he found was when he could say, I have heard of you before with my ears (no doubt it was the ears in his heart) but NOW I SEE. His spiritual eyes were opened; he met with God face to face so to speak. His relationship with God went from him being a righteous and faithful servant of Him, to a personal and intimate friend of the God of the universe. 

READ OSWALD CHAMBERS DEVOTION FOR TODAY, RIGHT HERE!

Gracious Uncertainty - Oswald Chambers

Today’s devotion of April 29, is one that I have been struggling with so much. Oswald said: “Our natural inclination is to be so precise—trying always to forecast accurately what will happen next—that we look upon uncertainty as a bad thing.” I have to admit that I left that stage of my life a long time ago. God forced me to get there by engineering circumstances in my life where I did not have a choice. For me it was “swim or sink”

Oswald said:  “Our common sense says, “Well, what if I were in that circumstance?” We cannot presume to see ourselves in any circumstance in which we have never been.” I found the more He keeps me in the waiting process, the more I learn to stop imagining my circumstances. (it’s a choice) I also found out that Satan knows us better than we know ourselves and he can tell when we are trying to live life ahead of God. Before we know it, this made up life in our mind becomes real. Sadly, as the imagined life becomes reality “in our mind”, there is a big conflict with the tangible life that we are living now, one that is involved interacting with others and it puts pressure on us to react a certain way as if our expectations are not being met. There is a movie coming out soon which is called “the secret life of Walter Mitty” I read this book a few decades ago and I remember how much I enjoyed it because I could identify with the protagonist. But, way back then, I was not a Christian, and felt there was nothing wrong in living this way to make my real life bearable.  My point here is that it is not Godly to live a life in conflict with the real life. It is the way of the unbeliever.

How do I know that? Because God has been hard at work in me trying so hard to drill it into my thick skull the past few years. There is nothing that Oswald Chambers has written in today’s devotion that is new to me or that I have not experienced with God. But, there are so many steps in between to get you to the point where one can live a life of gracious uncertainty with God. I am at the stage where I am still finding it hard to reconcile and live out the gracious uncertainty of my spiritual life as if it was a “normal life” and share it with no fear of being ridiculed or misunderstood by so called Christians. Gracious uncertainty while it is very much a SPIRITUAL LIFE, but it merges and embedded itself with the real and normal day to day life we live on earth. It is also part of living out a surrendered life, part of the transformation process, dependence and faith in God. It is strange that I do not mind the unbelievers, but my big challenge is those so called believers who are willing to think that I am an idiot and I am the one who does not understand God, because I am not making plans to present to God.

Here is my fight with God. He wants me to share and live out, my gracious uncertainty with pride. This pride I am referring to is the same pride that Paul felt when he said “I am not ashamed of the Gospel of God” and for some reason living out my spiritual life of gracious uncertainty is also related to that verse. Every single time He put me in a situation where I have to share proudly I both shy away or I do not answer all together. Then, I grumble in my heart that I do not have people to truly fellowship with. (Keep in mind that He taught me His idea of true fellowship)  Growing in gracious uncertainty is maturing in your spiritual life. When you fellowship with a bunch of believers who believe in their own belief, trying to tell them with joy, how you are uncertain of tomorrow, it feels like you are living out Matthew 7:6 "Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.” I am not uncertain of God, in fact, I AM CERTAIN OF GOD, but I hate the fact that He keeps putting me in situations where I have to share my uncertainty of what He is going to do next.

NEWS FLASH! I had all the intention of closing this post with something like “pray for me so that I can allow God to work this part of the gospel in my heart.” But would you believe as I am writing this post that God dealt with my heart? This is one of the things I love about this Christian life being a journey. You are never too mature to learn simple things with God and you can never outgrow this spiritual life. He just taught me that the reason I close-in, scared of sharing, scared of being ridiculed, misunderstood etc., is because I am not learning to leave the consequences of people’s misunderstanding, the shame of being ridiculed for my spiritual life and all that it entails, in His hands.

Can you see the domino effect of this spiritual journey? I got to go now because I have teary eyes and so many feelings that I have to deal with right now. What a journey we are called to live out with Him! This spiritual life is one that can only be lived out “IN THE SPIRIT!”

READ OSWALD CHAMBERS DEVOTION FOR TODAY APRIL 29 RIGHT HERE

Abraham’s Life of Faith — Faith Always Bring with it Radical Changes!

He went out, not knowing where he was going —Hebrews 11:8

Oswald Chambers said  "Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led. But it does mean loving and knowing the One who is leading. It is literally a life of faith, not of understanding and reason—a life of knowing Him who calls us to go. Faith is rooted in the knowledge of a Person, and one of the biggest traps we fall into is the belief that if we have faith, God will surely lead us to success in the world."

God has been keeping me on this holding and waiting pattern for so long that it is truly discouraging for any human being. If God has not put your whole life on hold to the point where you can see that your life is literally passing away right in front of your eyes, yet nothing, I mean absolutely nothing that you do works, then you have no idea what it means to wait on, upon and for God. For the past 15 years that I have been a Christian, any normal person would let go of Christianity. For me Christianity has been a synonym for being a “looser” big time. Sometimes, I feel I can’t even find the strength to think that God has not forgotten me. Sometimes I console myself with the idea that He put me on a fast track mode for a reason, because I cannot justify the lost, and the unending holding pattern. But, even when He shuts me out after I obey Him, I keep going forward with Him because I know too much to go back. When nothing makes sense and I feel like the biggest loser who has walked this earth, I keep going. When all my life is screaming that He has abandoned me, I keep going, knowing in His time, He will make everything right.

I have gone through phases with Him where He increased my faith more than I can imagine. You see, God has a pattern where He tests you and if you pass the test which means you make use of the amount of faith He allocates you, then He increases your faith. But lately, I have been asking Him, how come you stopped increasing my faith? Have I reached a plateau where I am not in your will or not trusting you enough? He did not answer me, however, a while after I inquired about my faith, He kept giving me a vision which I truly enjoy because it is so soothing to my soul. Today, as I read the devotional, I realized that He actually did answer my question. The visions that I have been getting are my answer to the question. The only thing is, through the vision, what I have been living in my soul is similar to some sort of higher sanctification stage. It is soothing because I can see how I am mellowing in His hands like I am disappearing slowly as He is increasing tenfold.  I can feel that the increase portion is His character being worked in me and I talked about that in my most recent posts.

Today, God opened my eyes to see that Oswald Chambers used the words that express all that I have been experiencing. I did not know this was the final stage of faith. I had tears of joy in my heart because as I reflect back, I know without the shadow of a doubt, that even when everyone told me that my situation could not be of God.  Even when I was told by leaders that I should take matters in my hands and make things happens, I always run things through God’s process and what I knew in my heart was right with the Holy Spirit. So today, I understand with a heart full of excitement, joy and gratitude what it means to walk a steadfast walk.

 True faith will always take us to a place where God calls us friend. This will not be a vague idea that you read about in the Bible or glibly repeat in a song. But the Holy Spirit will take pleasure to witness to your heart that you are now a friend of His. God, will not stop there, He will find an opportunity to share things with you that He would only share with a friend and when He does that, He will tell you that it is the privilege of being a friend of His.

True faith will lead you to a place where you know that it is not up to you to apply the characteristics of Christ within, but up to the Holy Spirit to do it. True faith will bring a radical change in your life and your heart. If it is not working out this radical change, then it is okay for you to question to what extend do you believe in God. A life of radical obedience will always lead you to a place where you can understand through your bones, every word of Christ’s crucifixion. True faith will always take you to a place where you stop imagining what God’s word means because you have become a living protagonist is the play. Until you become a protagonist, you have no idea what true faith means. Faith in God cannot be a vague idea and it cannot be our idea of what faith means. It has to be alive and leading your life because this faith we are called to live out in Him, is not our faith but Christ’s faith in us. Hence why, true faith will always take you through the same process that Christ went through and the same road. Anything short of that, then we can be sure that our faith is a blind faith. If it is a blind faith, it is not anchored in Christ.  Abraham started as a coward, yet he became the father of faith. TRUE FAITH WILL ALWAYS BRING WITH IT A RADICAL TRANSFORMATION.

OSWALD CHAMBERS "The final stage in the life of faith is the attainment of character, and we encounter many changes in the process. We feel the presence of God around us when we pray, yet we are only momentarily changed. We tend to keep going back to our everyday ways and the glory vanishes. A life of faith is not a life of one glorious mountaintop experience after another, like soaring on eagles’ wings, but is a life of day—in and day—out consistency; a life of walking without fainting (see Isaiah 40:31). It is not even a question of the holiness of sanctification, but of something which comes much farther down the road. It is a faith that has been tried and proved and has withstood the test. Abraham is not a type or an example of the holiness of sanctification, but a type of the life of faith—a faith, tested and true, built on the true God. “Abraham believed God. . .” (Romans 4:3)."

Faith - Part 10/10

Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that comes to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.”

Faith is not as easy as we think it is. It is so easy for us to criticize the Israelites for not trusting God when they could not find water, just three days after they have had such great experiences with God. The only way we can understand why it was so hard for them to do something that appear so simple is to walk a mile in their shoes. Faith is not that easy when your life depends on it.

When I was led to a place where I truly had to trust God and believe with all my life that it was the right thing for me to lose everything, become penniless, homeless and jobless the first thing I said to Him was “ you mean I have to believe for real?”  I was not trying to be funny or clever. Those words came out of my mouth simply because I came face to face with my idea of faith and God’s idea. My idea of faith consisted of words, experiences, activities, emotions and so on and it was all beautiful as far as I was concerned and also for people observing me. There was no effort, no building up on faith, no trying to do anything that was peculiar, no God to impress, no letting go of my common sense and believe anything mystical about this Christian life.

When I uttered the words “you want me to believe for real?” All of the sudden I realized He was asking me to trust someone that no one has ever seen. He was asking me to believe those words that I have been reading in the Bible which were inspired by an invisible God. He was asking me to believe all those things I have been reading about Salvation and Christ truly died and most of all I had to believe that He truly ascended into heaven.  Yes, by the time He asked me to believe and bet my life on Him, I was experiencing Him and He was so real to me, but that’s not faith either. I found myself asking Him “but, how do I know you are not a figment of my imagination?” The reason we have this “fight and flight” response when God is testing our faith, it is because everything about faith defy logic and when common sense is out of the windows we have nothing else to go on.

When we look at Hebrews 11:6 most of us go through it and do not even think twice about what we are repeating. It was a frightening thing for me to master just this tiny part of the verse which is: “For he that comes to God must believe that he is.”   Do you realize even the demons are ahead of us? They believe so much that they shudder in the presence of Christ. You might think that this is beside the point that I am trying to make in this post. But it is not. The reason is, throughout my walk with God I never lose sight of the fact that even demons shudder in Christ’s presence and they live with great reverence toward God. So, I need to know that my walk goes further than that and the only way it is going to differentiate me from the demons is what I decide to do with my trust in Him and how well I am going to accept His leadership. In that sense, His leadership has to become a reality in my life and yours. I will never be content with an assumption that I am probably being led by Him.

I did not trust God right away and I spent days weighing things and trying to work it all out in my heart. One day, the Holy Spirit knew I was struggling with the idea of banking real life and real consequences with an invisible God that might not be real.” The compassion of the Holy Spirit was out of this world, with so much understanding and tenderness, He said “Jess” look into your heart, don’t try to understand with your mind but think about the changes that you know happened within you. Are these real changes? I had to say yes because few minutes at the feet of God is worth months of learning and changes on the inside. I knew I had become a different person because I had a spiritual relationship with Him. This life was mine and no one could take it away from my heart and I knew for a fact, this inward change and spiritual relationship were not my imagination. So, the Holy Spirit said then hold onto to what you know is true in this relationship and take the next step of faith with Him, this part of you that you cherish so much has been given to you by this invisible God you are doubting right now.  Only then, I knew I could trust Him for the next step.

Notice something, when I was not able to trust Him I did not get busy trying my earnest to bury what was going on in my life, through friends, social media, time spent on the internet or church activities.  I stayed close to Him and continued my Bible and prayer time along with mediation with a heart ready and willing to receive more instructions.  Another thing I found out, God is happy when we trust Him, but He is glorified when we trust right away within thinking twice about what He asks of us. So, He keeps taking us through more testing and as time goes by, we too we can see how fast we react in trusting His leading.  But, even when God is taking us through further testing, I find that sometimes we are totally oblivious to what He is doing until we take our focus off of us and look onto Jesus.

Throughout the years God has never let go and has always been by my side. It turns out, I never had to be on the streets because God had chosen a place for me to go and He prepared this person to receive me. But when you are dealing with a mean drunk who is always looking for the next fight, it is not easy.  While God prepared the heart of this person to give me a place to live, He did not take away his need to blackmail me day in day out. Everyday I lived with a constant reminder that I can be out on the streets.  As anxieties set in, it took me a few weeks to understand that I had no right to panic.

One day I received the usual threats and I was shown the doors, all of the sudden I realized that I have been living with anxieties in my heart instead of trusting God. I remember stopping what I was doing and instead of getting upset or taking the doors like I was told, one verse came to mind and I thought about the lilies of the valleys. Then I told myself, if God takes care of them, I am so much more than a lily to Him. I realized I had an extraordinary opportunity to once again trust His word and have faith in Him. I can smile about it now when I see how much God used this man’s meanness to keep testing my faith in Him until my faith was as strong as an oak tree.

God used this person's character to keep me deeper in my surrendering. There, I found not only there are three levels of surrendering to God but after a while you learn to live a life totally abandoned to Him. (& yes I found out there was a major spiritual difference between living the surrendered life and a life of complete abandonment to His will.)  I personally learned that the life of total abandonment resemble to the life of a branch attached to the tree of life and sucking everything needed to survive and flourish. No, you are not perfect, and you can step out of the abandoned life once in a while but the beauty of living a life totally abandoned to Him, is that you know when you step out of Him, because you are like a fish out of water.

I also learned, the faith that God is looking for has nothing to do with the opportunities we create for ourselves while forging our own footprints. Because, true faith is always about not knowing and not seeing, yet you chose to believe and walk the path however hard and in spite of the consequences. Our faith is directly related to our obedience to God‘s word.  Throughout the Bible faith is never about how well we believed in the past, but how well we pass today’s test of faith, Christianity is a continuous spiritual fight to keep your faith renewed in Him daily.

Brothers and sisters there is nothing glorious about my life, it is actually full of shame and hardships. I poured my heart out to you and shared my shame because if God could use my story to bring your forward and stop a man-made Christian walk, if you can end up in His arms of love, then glory to Him! You and I will not only meet in heaven but we will be right there serving as royalty, by His side.

 In His Agape Love & Service

MJ

As I was reading Oswald Chambers today, I cringed, because I could still taste this lesson in my soul. You see it is easy to repeat those words and feel good about ourselves. It is easy to get all sentimental, thinking, 'I have His promise for ever He will not forsake me no matter what.' Then we go on with a false assurance thinking that everything is “groovy”.  I know it because until I understood Salvation from God’s point of view, if someone would have told me that there was more to it than feeling good about reading these things, I would have been very unhappy. Why? Because when we live in our ignorance, it is not that we do not know something is missing, but we do not dare go deeper to find out what is missing. Somehow in our mind we convince ourselves to remain just where we are and live with some kind of emotional Christianity all the while convincing ourselves that God is satisfied and all is well.

Imagine my surprise during the wilderness time that I was experiencing with Him, a time where my soul was already isolated, wounded, and hollow. I found out it was important to Him that these beautiful words I so treasure in my head and felt so good about, had to make their way to my heart. Frankly, I could not understand what God’s problem was since I was feeling so good when I read these things? Just the fact that they made me feel so good toward Him should be enough for Him. Besides, nobody ever told me there was another layer to it, so why was the Holy Spirit rocking my boat?

You see, true Christianity demands that those words, enter our heads, go down to our hearts, where the Holy Spirit weave them in us. At that time, God made me experience the coolness of having ears in our hearts. I remember saying, wow! I have ears in my heart. Since this experience persisted and I woke up the next morning as if someone had put my ears in my heart and those two ears I have attached to my head, were completely irrelevant. In fact they were useless to God. Then I ask Him “why is it I can only hear with my heart?” That’s when the Spirit explained things to me. Suffice to say I lived out three awesome days where I could have been deaf and it would not have mattered to me because I had a different set of ears which I found out is part of the new heart.

There is a big difference between hearing with our heads and hearing with our hearts. The Pharisees who missed out on Christ, one of their problems was that the word of God could never take root within. All they possessed of their religion, was part of their intellect and they felt holier than thou, yet that was enough for them. This is us today if we insist living shallow lives and never let the Holy Spirit move freely in our lives. Again, the Israelites in the wilderness missed out on God’s blessings because they could not get that. Notice that every time they finished enjoying a blessing of God, He then tested them. They never passed one single test, because everything was at the level of their heads and emotions.

When I lost everything in the wilderness, only one friend offered me a place to stay until I get back on my feet. Somehow I knew that’s not what God had in mind for me and He kept telling me in my heart where He wanted me to go. At that time, it defied logic that God would send me to live with one of the meanest person I know. Yet, it was amazing in the way it happened; I did not have to beg. Soon, I found out God intended to test my heart whether I believe or not that He will never forsake me. As far as I was concerned that was the wrong timing because too much was going on in my life at once. But, God did not care.

Imagine having to live in a place where you are constantly reminded where the doors are? Imagine when you act as if you do not understand, it was spelled out for you over and over again? The daily roller coaster, the emotional torture and the fear of being on the streets were enough to drive me crazy. All the while God was making sure I knew that going to my friend’s place who invited me few months back, was not an option. I went through this for months with the wrong attitude and wrong beliefs. God was waiting for me to get to the right place, in the meantime, the Holy Spirit was working out salvation in other parts of me, within me. When over a year has passed and I had the same problem to deal with, the stress of this life was killing me. Only then, I was willing to HEAR God. You see, I was too busy feeling sorry for myself and what my life has become. Too busy feeling the pain of the true Christian life and too busy reassuring myself with the wrong Bible verses, to hear what He was trying to accomplish in me and with me.

All He wanted was for me to change my attitude, stop fearing the idea of being homeless, and trust that He is in control. He wanted me to stop worrying. Yet, He offered no other assurance that if I stop fearing the idea of being homeless, I was not going to be homeless. Then, He made me understand that if I could not find peace through knowing that He is truly God, He is in control, and let go of my life in His care even when I do not understand. If I could not stop being afraid of the outcome where it seemed that nothing was to my advantage, and the end result was humiliation and dying on the streets, that would mean to Him that His word does not matter to me. It would mean to Him that I do not trust Him and I do not have faith in Him.

Through this lesson I learned two things. When we can see the circumstances of our lives through His eyes, it is because the word of God has made its way through the heart, it is no longer at the level of the intellect and the emotion. Secondly, when we set out to obey His word through our circumstances, we make the decision to trust and have complete faith and no matter what He decides for us, it is well with the soul, then the impartation process takes place.

When I made the decision to stop being afraid, just trust Him in whatever He decided for me in this situation I was in, I knew the worst could happen to me. I also had to find a peaceful way to live with it. When you find that peaceful way, it is all well with your soul, because you stop claiming and fighting for your rights. You stop feeding the self, the flesh (dying to self.) by the way, this is part of the process of discipleship that Christ was talking about in luke 14:33 and it is also salvation being worked out in your soul. I truly hope through this you can see why salvation cannot be separated from sanctification and discipleship process. Anyway, as you stop claiming your rights to self, you realize, you actually stepped into the new life you have in Him. As you deal with these trials and circumstances, His way, those words like “He will never leave me, nor forsake me” become the fibber of who you are and what you are made of, because He works them out in you. 

As I grew more and more spiritually, I found out these circumstances as I shared above, were only basic faith being worked out in me. When it comes to working out salvation in us, God usually kills 100's of birds with one stone. Here is the kicker, you find that every day is a challenge to live out this life truly knowing in your heart and soul, that He will never leave you nor forsake you. Every day is an opportunity to truly trust and have faith In Him!

Courtesy of: God Endures Forever Blog

The Never-Forsaking God

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2013

He Himself has said, ’I will never leave you nor forsake you’ —Hebrews 13:5

What line of thinking do my thoughts take? Do I turn to what God says or to my own fears? Am I simply repeating what God says, or am I learning to truly hear Him and then to respond after I have heard what He says? “For He Himself has said, ’I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ So we may boldly say: ’The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?’ ” (Hebrews 13:5-6).

“I will never leave you . . .”— not for any reason; not my sin, selfishness, stubbornness, nor waywardness. Have I really let God say to me that He will never leave me? If I have not truly heard this assurance of God, then let me listen again.

“I will never . . . forsake you.” Sometimes it is not the difficulty of life but the drudgery of it that makes me think God will forsake me. When there is no major difficulty to overcome, no vision from God, nothing wonderful or beautiful— just the everyday activities of life— do I hear God’s assurance even in these?

We have the idea that God is going to do some exceptional thing— that He is preparing and equipping us for some extraordinary work in the future. But as we grow in His grace we find that God is glorifying Himself here and now, at this very moment. If we have God’s assurance behind us, the most amazing strength becomes ours, and we learn to sing, glorifying Him even in the ordinary days and ways of life.

Courtesy of: http://utmost.org/

The Way of Permanent Faith

As I was reading Oswald Chambers today, I realized I would have been very excited if it was not for the fact that I have gone through the process of what he is talking about and know the inward pain that your soul has to endure to get through this process.

Indeed during this period of time, we are so scattered inside, so hollow, so depressed by the darkness that surround us. As you go through this process, you also understand why the word wilderness suits it so well. Your pain comes from the dryness, the sun, the win and everything that encompasses the wilderness. It is so desolate all around you, in your heart, your soul and your spirit that the only thing that makes sense to your senses is the depression that the whole process is calling you to.

But, if you can keep focusing on Him while you are there, even though there is no excitement and no joy during this period, you will get through it and joy will come back again when you see how much you have grown. Through this period there is a long waiting process in between that is very discouraging. Another major point of this process is that God needs to take you to a place where you learn to abide in Him and you learn to depend on Him moment by moment for your life.

As you learn to abide in Him, you realize, the reality of you abiding in Him is so that the next part of the verse (abide in me and I in you) could take shape in your life. The whole doctrine of abiding in Him is so that He can reveal Himself to you, Christ can be formed in you as you learn to possess His mind, His likeness and all those substances that we need to take from Him. There are ways for sure you know you have gone through the process exactly the way He wanted you to.  First, you get out of it knowing full well what Paul meant when he said “for me to live is Christ”.

Another way you know you are pleasing to Him is that you realize you have become the protagonist of song of the Solomon 8:5 “Who is this coming up from the wilderness leaning on her beloved?” Because now, you not only have learned to get to know Him, you know you can depend on Him. So, your faith is solid and your understanding of Him is on a whole new dimension which is the spiritual one as you left behind the man made idea of Him. In fact, you look back to what you knew of Him and where you are now, and you are ashamed of what you made out Christianity to be. You also make a transition from knowing about Him to knowing Him. The thing is, you find you are now ready to look at this Christian life, His way. Another thing you will discover as well is that you are in the process of being made right with Him. This process takes you beyond spirituality into your way of right living in His sight. Righteousness is being restored. (Mathew 5:6)

So, if you are depressed and your life is upside down and you feel you are fenced in, look up to Him through the pain, the sadness, the emptiness, the scorching sun of the wilderness, the coldness that is eating your body, focus on Him and lift up your soul to Him. You do not have to make lengthy prayers because He knows already. Just the fact that you can remain focused on Him and in your heart letting Him know, no matter what you want to make it about Him and give Him glory for whatever is going on right now, then, He will be pleased. Don’t make it about your feelings because joy already escaped you, He is nowhere to be found and it is all messy and scattered inside you. – But, be patient however long it lasts, remain committed to seeing it through His ways and do not allow doubt to enter your mind.

When I went through my process, even though at times I could not pray, I would make it a point to pray in my heart. At times He was so absent I felt He was not hanging onto me at all. I did not let the enemy get the best of me. I did not confer with anyone that would discourage me or prescribe some sort of diversion.  I resolved to make it about Him even if I had to die. Once in a while, He would show me that even though I could not feel His presence because of the state of my soul, but He was right there with me and actually never left me for a moment. Those tiny glimmers of hope helped me a great deal. – Be still and know that He is God!

Here is Oswald Chambers devotional for today!

The Way to Permanent Faith

04

04

2013

Indeed the hour is coming . . . that you will be scattered . . . —John 16:32

Jesus was not rebuking the disciples in this passage. Their faith was real, but it was disordered and unfocused, and was not at work in the important realities of life. The disciples were scattered to their own concerns and they had interests apart from Jesus Christ. After we have the perfect relationship with God, through the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit, our faith must be exercised in the realities of everyday life. We will be scattered, not into service but into the emptiness of our lives where we will see ruin and barrenness, to know what internal death to God’s blessings means. Are we prepared for this? It is certainly not of our own choosing, but God engineers our circumstances to take us there. Until we have been through that experience, our faith is sustained only by feelings and by blessings. But once we get there, no matter where God may place us or what inner emptiness we experience, we can praise God that all is well. That is what is meant by faith being exercised in the realities of life.

“. . . you . . . will leave Me alone.” Have we been scattered and have we left Jesus alone by not seeing His providential care for us? Do we not see God at work in our circumstances? Dark times are allowed and come to us through the sovereignty of God. Are we prepared to let God do what He wants with us? Are we prepared to be separated from the outward, evident blessings of God? Until Jesus Christ is truly our Lord, we each have goals of our own which we serve. Our faith is real, but it is not yet permanent. And God is never in a hurry. If we are willing to wait, we will see God pointing out that we have been interested only in His blessings, instead of in God Himself. The sense of God’s blessings is fundamental

“. . . be of good cheer, I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). Unyielding spiritual fortitude is what we need.

Oswald's devotion for today is courtesy of: http://utmost.org/

If you are going through a time where you are not sure what is going on in your Christian walk,  inside you feel empty, sad, overwhelmed and depressed; all of the sudden the Christianity you thought you knew, the Christianity that brought you so much joy is far out of reach. You feel like you are on some kind of automatic pilot. Even faking a smile is hard for you. Then you are going through what Oswald called the discipline of dismay. The discipline of dismay lasts a little while. It is a dark period of your life that your soul needs to go through if your Christianity is to amount to anything to God.

Like Oswald said, we tend to look back on our time of obedience and our past sacrifices to God in an effort to keep our enthusiasm for him strong (see Isaiah 50:10-11) One of the mistake we make is to try and find the enthusiasm back. We do not realize that God is not looking for that enthusiasm, He in fact does not care for it. He wants you to endure the inexplicable pain that you are in right now, while seeking His face and focus on Him like there is no tomorrow.

What Oswald did not know when he wrote that piece is that we are in a time where when the enthusiasm for God is gone, the younger generation falls back on Social Media to seek encouragement.  So they find comfort through those shallow comments these professed Christians have perfected over the years, but with no real meaning to their lives. I noticed as well the younger generation lack guidance and understanding coming from their own family. If they had parents living deeper Christian lives with Him, parents who have gone through the process with God, those younger people would have a better understanding of what is going on and would stop in seeking for the type of band-aid comfort they find on Social Media. 

What we do not realize, when God takes us through a time of dismay, it is indeed a good thing for our soul and our walk with Him. While we are there, it does not seem it is possible that any good can come of it because there is so much confusion just trying to understand why we are where we are with Him. But, it is good because God is taking you beyond a time where you can bypass the sense of self-satisfaction you get from your Bible reading, prayer time, and Christian activities. He is taking you deeper into Him. The sad thing is, until God takes you there, you would never realize that you have been living a self-satisfying kind of Christian life.

This phase is mandatory, the waiting process, His silence, the fact that you do not recognize Him and He is becoming more and more like a stranger to you. The protest that you will go through, the soul searching, the lack of answers from Him, are all part of the process. The attitude He is looking for is for you to surrender it all to Him, for you to stop protesting, for you to trust those words you have been reading in the Bible and trust that He is a faithful God. When you go through it with the right attitude, you position yourself to receive more of His grace.

It is a time of great depression and no matter what you do, your soul cannot get out of it. Don’t despair, and don’t panic. If you surrender through the process, I promise you, He will take care of you in the same way He took care of Elijah when he was running for his life and God sent an Angel to feed Him and care for him.  He will take care of you in the same way He took care of Paul who was so discouraged that nothing could revive his soul, God had to send an angel on three occasions to reassure him and strengthen him.

So, if you are going to a dark time with Him, I beg of you, stop seeking for temporary shallow satisfaction. It is a time to hang on to Him more than ever. It is the perfect time to test Hebrews 13:5 “I will never desert you nor forsake you.”  Trust in the God of your Salvation. Look to His Cross. It is hard to let go of all we know and to hang on to Him especially at a time where we have no answer and He seems more absent than we have ever experienced. But it is okay. It will feel as if you are asked to let go of something that is holding you nicely and help you stand up, for something you have no idea what it is, where it is, what it is made of. In fact within yourself, you have no desire of letting go of something you can see for something you cannot see. But, your soul needs to go through it all. Your soul needs to learn to trust what it cannot see

  

That’s exactly what He wants from you. Even though nothing makes sense to you, I beg of you to trust Him and He will not fail you.

In essence, what you are doing during this period, is giving up your identity to take on His!

Here is Oswald Chambers's devotion for today

The Discipline of Dismay

03

15

2013

As they followed they were afraid —Mark 10:32

At the beginning of our life with Jesus Christ, we were sure we knew all there was to know about following Him. It was a delight to forsake everything else and to throw ourselves before Him in a fearless statement of love. But now we are not quite so sure. Jesus is far ahead of us and is beginning to seem different and unfamiliar— “Jesus was going before them; and they were amazed” (Mark 10:32).

There is an aspect of Jesus that chills even a disciple’s heart to its depth and makes his entire spiritual life gasp for air. This unusual Person with His face set “like a flint” (Isaiah 50:7) is walking with great determination ahead of me, and He strikes terror right through me. He no longer seems to be my Counselor and Friend and has a point of view about which I know nothing. All I can do is stand and stare at Him in amazement. At first I was confident that I understood Him, but now I am not so sure. I begin to realize that there is a distance between Jesus and me and I can no longer be intimate with Him. I have no idea where He is going, and the goal has become strangely distant.

Jesus Christ had to understand fully every sin and sorrow that human beings could experience, and that is what makes Him seem unfamiliar. When we see this aspect of Him, we realize we really don’t know Him. We don’t recognize even one characteristic of His life, and we don’t know how to begin to follow Him. He is far ahead of us, a Leader who seems totally unfamiliar, and we have no friendship with Him.

The discipline of dismay is an essential lesson which a disciple must learn. The danger is that we tend to look back on our times of obedience and on our past sacrifices to God in an effort to keep our enthusiasm for Him strong (see Isaiah 1:10-11). But when the darkness of dismay comes, endure until it is over, because out of it will come the ability to follow Jesus truly, which brings inexpressibly wonderful joy

Courtesy of: http://utmost.org/