This is a Blog for those interested in following hard after His heart. Those willing to strive to live a moment-by-moment life as we go through the transformation process with Him. It is not an easy life, but the Father expects each of us to become an offering for His pleasure. So, if this is you, then let’s journey together hand in hand. I am humbled that you have chosen to walk with me. Thanks!
31 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — THE INTERNAL CONFLICT, OR BUNYAN'S CONVICTIONS AND CONVERSION.4
In addition to his
want of scriptural education, it must be remembered that, when he thought of
miraculous power being evidence of faith, his mind was in a most excited
state—doubts spread over him like huge masses of thick black clouds, hiding
the Sun of Righteousness from his sight. Not only is he to be pardoned for his
error, but admired for the humility which prompted him to record so singular a
trial, and his escape from 'this delusion of the tempter.' While 'thus he was
tossed betwixt the devil and his own ignorance,' the happiness of the poor
women whose conversation he had heard at Bedford, was brought to his
recollection by a remarkable reverie or daydream:—
'About this time, the
state and happiness of these poor people at Bedford were thus, in a dream or
vision, represented to me. I saw as if they were set on the sunny side of some
high mountain, there refreshing themselves with the pleasant beams of the sun,
while I was shivering and shrinking in the cold, afflicted with frost, snow,
and dark clouds. Methought also, betwixt me and them, I saw a wall that did
compass about this mountain; now through this wall my soul did greatly desire
to pass, concluding that if I could, I would go even into the very midst of
them, and they also comfort myself with the heat of their sun.
'About this wall, I
thought myself to go, again and again, still prying, as I went, to see if I
could find some way or passage, by which I might enter therein; but none could
I find for some time. At the last I saw, as it were, a narrow gap, like a little
doorway in the wall, through which I attempted to pass; but the passage being
very strait and narrow, I made many efforts to get in, but all in vain, even
until I was well nigh quite beat out, by striving to get in; at last, with the great striving, methought I at first did get in my head, and after that, by a
sidling striving, my shoulders, and my whole body; then I was exceeding glad,
and went and sat down in the midst of them, and so was comforted with the light
and heat of their sun.
'Now this mountain,
and wall, was thus made out to me: The mountain signified the church of the
living God; the sun that shone thereon, the comfortable shining of his merciful
face on them that were therein; the wall I thought was the Word, that did make the separation between the Christians and the world; and the gap which was in this
wall, I thought, was Jesus Christ, who is the way to God the Father (John 14:6;
Matt 7:14). But forasmuch as the passage was wonderful narrow, even so, narrow
that I could not, but with great difficulty, enter in thereat, it showed me,
that none could enter into life, but those that were in downright earnest, and
unless also they left this wicked world behind them; for there was only room for
body and soul, but not for body and soul and sin.
'This resemblance
abode upon my spirit many days; all which time I saw myself in a forlorn and
sad condition, but yet was provoked to a vehement hunger and desire to be one
of that number that did sit in the sunshine. Now also I should pray wherever I
was; whether at home or abroad, in house or field, and should also often, with
lifting up of heart, sing that of the fifty-first Psalm, "O Lord, consider
my distress."'
In this striking
reverie, we discover the budding forth of that great genius who produced the most
beautiful flowers and delicious fruit, when it became fully developed in his
allegories.
While this trial
clouded his spirits, he was called to endure temptations that are common to
most, if not all, inquiring souls, and which frequently produce much anxiety.
He plunged into the university problems of predestination before he had
completed his lower grammar-school exercises on faith and repentance. Am I one
of the elect? or has the day of grace been suffered to pass by never to return?
'Although he was in a flame to find the way to heaven and glory,' these
questions afflicted and disquieted him so that the very strength of his body
was taken away by the force and power thereof. 'Lord, thought I, what if I
should not be elected! It may be you are not, said the tempter; it may be so,
indeed thought I. Why then, said Satan, you had as good leave off, and strive
no farther; for if indeed you should not be elected and chosen of God, there is
no talk of your being saved; "for it is neither of him that will, nor
of him, that runs, but of God that shows mercy."
'By these things I
was driven to my wit's end, not knowing what to say, or how to answer these
temptations. Indeed, I little thought that Satan had thus assaulted me, but
that rather it was my own prudence thus to start the question: for that the
elect only obtained eternal life; that I without scruple did heartily close
withal; but that myself was one of them, there lay all the question.'
30 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — THE INTERNAL CONFLICT, OR BUNYAN'S CONVICTIONS AND CONVERSION.3
By this time he had
recovered the art of reading, and its use a little perplexed him, for he became
much puzzled with the opinions of the Renters, as set forth in their books. It
is extremely difficult to delineate their sentiments; they were despised by all
the sects which had been connected with the government, because, with the
Quakers and Baptists, they denied any magisterial or state authority over
conscience, and refused maintenance to ministers; but from the testimony of
Bunyan, and that of the early Quakers, they appear to have been practical
Antinomians, or at least very nearly allied to the new sect called Mormonites.
Ross, who copied from Pagitt, describes them with much bitterness—'The Renters are unclean beasts—their maxim is that there is nothing sin but what a man
thinks to be so—they reject the Bible—they are the merriest of all devils—they
deny all obedience to magistrates.'
This temptation must have been severe. The Renters were like the black man with the white robe, named Flatterer, who led the pilgrims into a net, under the pretense of showing them the way to the celestial city; or like Adam the first, who offered Faithful his three daughters to wife—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—if he would dwell with him in the town of Deceit. 'These temptations,' he says, 'were suitable to my flesh,' I being but a young man, and my nature in its prime; and, with his characteristic humility, he adds, 'God, who had, as I hope, designed me for better things, kept me in the fear of his name, and did not suffer me to accept such cursed principles.' Prayer opened the door of escape; it led him to the fountain of truth. 'I began to look into the Bible with new eyes. Prayer preserved me from Ranting errors.
The Bible was precious to me in those days.' His study of the Holy Oracles now became a daily habit, and that with intense earnestness and prayer. In the midst of the multitude of sects with which he was on all sides surrounded, he felt the need of a standard for the opinions which were each of them eagerly followed by votaries, who proclaimed them to be THE TRUTH, the way, and the life. He was like a man, feeling that if he erred in the way, it would be attended with misery, and, but for Divine interference, with unutterable ruin—possessed of a correct map, but surrounded with those who, by flattery, or threats, or deceit, and armed with all human eloquence, strove to mislead him.
With an enemy within to urge him to accept their wily guidance, that they might
lead him to perdition—inspired by Divine grace, like Christian in his Pilgrim,
he 'put his fingers in his ears, and ran on, crying Life, life, eternal life.'
He felt utter dependence upon Divine guidance, leading him to most earnest prayer,
and implicit obedience to Holy Writ, which followed him all through the
remainder of his pilgrimage. 'The Bible' he calls 'the scaffold, or stage, that
God has built for hope to play his part upon in this world.' Hence the
Word was precious in his eyes; and with so immense a loss, or so magnificent a
gain, the throne of grace was all his hope, that he might be guided by that
counsel that cannot err, and that should eventually insure his reception to
eternal glory.
While in this inquiring state, he experienced much doubt and uncertainty arising from the apparent confidence of many professors. In his own esteem he appeared to be thoroughly humbled; and when he lighted on that passage—'To one is given by the spirit the word of wisdom, to another, knowledge, and to another, faith' (1 Cor 12:8,9), his solemn inquiry was, how it happened that he possessed so little of any of these gifts of wisdom, knowledge, or faith—more especially of faith, that being essential to the pleasing of God. He had read (Matt 21:21),
'If ye have faith and doubt not, ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done'; and (Luke 17:6), 'If ye had faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye might say to this sycamore tree, Be thou plucked up by the root, and be thou planted in the sea, and it shall obey you'; and (1 Cor 13:2), 'Though I have all faith so that I could remove mountains.' The poor tinker, considering these passages in their literal import, imagined they were meant as tests to try whether the believer possessed faith or not. He was a stranger to the rules of Hebrew rhetoric; nor did he consider that they were addressed to the apostles, who had the power to work miracles.
He had no idea
that removing a mountain or planting a sycamore tree in the sea, were
figures of speech conveying to us the fact that, aided by faith, mountainous
difficulties might and would be overcome. Anxious for some ocular demonstration
that he had faith, he almost determined to attempt to work a miracle—not to
convert or confirm the faith of others, but to satisfy his own mind as to his
possessing faith. He had no such magnificent idea as the removal of a mountain,
for there were none in his neighbourhood, nor to plant a tree in the sea, for
Bedfordshire is an inland county; but it was of the humblest kind—that some
puddles on the road between Elstow and Bedford should change places with the
dry ground. When he had thought of praying for ability, his natural good sense
led him to abandon the experiment.
29 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — THE INTERNAL CONFLICT, OR BUNYAN'S CONVICTIONS AND CONVERSION.2
Bunyan was now
dressed in the garb of a religious professor and had become a brisk talker in
the matters of religion, when, by Divine mercy, he was stripped of all his good
opinion of himself; his want of holiness, and his unchanged heart, were
revealed to his surprise and wonder, by means simple and efficacious, but which
no human forethought could have devised. Being engaged in his trade at Bedford,
he overheard the conversation of some poor pious women, and it humbled and
alarmed him. 'I heard, but I understood not; for they were far above, out of my
reach. Their talk was about a new birth, the work of God on their hearts, also
how they were convinced of their miserable state by nature; how God had visited
their souls with his love in the Lord Jesus, and with what words and promises
they had been refreshed, comforted, and supported against the temptations of
the devil.
Moreover, they
reasoned of the suggestions and temptations of Satan in particular; and told to
each other by which they had been afflicted, and how they were borne up under
his assaults. hey also discoursed of their own wretchedness of heart, of their
unbelief; and did contemn, slight, and abhor their own righteousness, as filthy
and insufficient to do them any good. And methought they spake as if joy did
make them speak; they spake with such pleasantness of Scripture language, and
with such appearance of grace in all they said, that they were to me as if they
had found a new world; as if they were people that dwelt alone, and were not to
be reckoned among their neighbours (Num 23:9).
'At this I felt my
own heart began to shake, as mistrusting my condition to be naught; for I saw
that in all my thoughts about religion and salvation, the new birth did never
enter into my mind; neither knew I the comfort of the Word and promise, nor the
deceitfulness and treachery of my own wicked heart. As for secret thoughts, I
took no notice of them; neither did I understand what Satan's temptations were,
nor how they were to be withstood and resisted.
'Thus, therefore,
when I heard and considered what they said, I left them and went about my
employment again, but their talk and discourse went with me; also my heart
would tarry with them, for I was greatly affected by their words, both
because by them I was convinced that I wanted the true tokens of a truly godly
man, and also because by them I was convinced of the happy and blessed
condition of him that was such a one.'
The brisk talker of 'talkative,' was confounded—he heard pious godly women mourning over their worthlessness instead of vaunting of their attainments. They exhibited, doubtless to his great surprise, that self-distrust and humility are the beginnings of wisdom.
These humble disciples could have had no conception
that the Holy Spirit was blessing their Christian communion to the mind of the
tinker, standing near them, pursuing his occupation. The recollection of the
converse of these poor women led to solemn heart-searching and the most painful anxiety; again and again, he sought their
company, and his convictions became deeper, his solicitude more intense.
This was the
commencement of an internal struggle, the most remarkable of any upon record,
except that of the psalmist David.
It was the work of
the Holy Spirit in regenerating and preparing an ignorant and rebellious man
for extraordinary submission to the sacred Scriptures, and for most extensive
usefulness. To those who never experienced in any degree such feelings, they
appear to indicate religious insanity. It was so marvelous and so mysterious,
as to be mistaken by a poet laureate, who profanely calls it a being 'shaken
continually by the hot and cold fits of a spiritual ague': 'reveries': or one
of the 'frequent and contagious disorders of the human mind,' instead of
considering it as wholesome but bitter medicine for the soul, administered by
the heavenly Physician. At times he felt, like David, 'a sword in his bones,'
'tears his meat.' God's waves and billows overwhelmed him (Psa 43). Then came
glimmerings of hope—precious promises saving him from despair—followed by the
shadow of death overspreading his soul, and involving him in midnight darkness.
He could complain in the bitterness of his anguish, 'Thy fierce wrath goeth
over me.' Bound in affliction and iron, his 'soul was melted because of
trouble.'
'Now Satan assaults
the soul with darkness, fears, frightful thoughts of apparitions; now they
sweat, pant, and struggle for life. The angels now come (Psa 107) down to
behold the sight, and rejoice to see a bit of dust and ashes to overcome
principalities, and powers, and might, and dominion.' His mind was fixed on
eternity, and out of the abundance of his heart he spoke to one of his former
companions; his language was that of reproof—'Harry, why do you swear and curse
thus? what will become of you if you die in this condition?' His sermon,
probably the first he had preached, was like throwing pearls before swine—'He
answered in a great chafe, what would the devil do for company, if it were not
for such as I am.'
28 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — THE INTERNAL CONFLICT, OR BUNYAN'S CONVICTIONS AND CONVERSION.1
Here was a disease
that set all human skill at defiance, but the great, the Almighty Physician,
cured it with strange physic. Had any professor reproved him, it might have
been passed by as a matter of course; but it was so ordered that a woman who
was notorious 'a very loose and ungodly wretch,' protested that she trembled
to hear him swear and curse at that most fearful rate; that he was the
ungodliest fellow she had ever heard, and that he was able to spoil all the
youth in a whole town. Public reproof from the lips of such a woman was an
arrow that pierced his inmost soul; it effected a reformation marvelous to all
his companions, and bordering upon the miraculous.
The walls of a
fortified city were once thrown down by a shout and the tiny blast of
rams'-horns (Josh 6:20); and in this instance, the foundations of Heart Castle,
fortified by Satan, are shaken by the voice of one of his own emissaries.
Mortified and convicted, the foul-mouthed blasphemer swore no more; an outward
reformation in words and conduct took place, but without inward spiritual life.
Thus was he making vows to God and breaking them, repenting and promising to do
better next time; so, to use his own homely phrase, he was 'feeding God with
chapters, and prayers, and promises, and vows, and a great many more such dainty
dishes, and thinks that he serveth God as well as any man in England can, while
he has only got into a cleaner way to hell than the rest of his neighbours are
in.'
Such a conversion, as
he himself calls it, was 'from prodigious profaneness to something like moral
life.' 'Now I was, as they said, become godly, and their words pleased me well,
though as yet I was nothing but a poor painted hypocrite.' These are hard
words, but, in the most important sense, they were true. He was pointed out as
a miracle of mercy—the great convert—a wonder to the world. He could now suffer
opprobrium and cavils—play with errors—entangle himself and drink in flattery.
No one can suppose that this outward reform was put on hypocritically, as a disguise
to attain some sinister object; it was real, but it arose from a desire to
shine before his neighbours, from shame and from the fear of future punishment,
and not from that love to God which leads the Christian to the fear of
offending him. It did not arise from a change of heart; the secret springs of
action remained polluted; it was outside show, and therefore he called himself
a painted hypocrite. He became less a despiser of religion, but more awfully a
destroyer of his own soul.
A new source of uneasiness
now presented itself in his practice of bell-ringing, an occupation requiring
severe labour, usually performed on the Lord's-day; and, judging from the
general character of bell-ringers, it has a most injurious effect, both with
regard to morals and religion. A circumstance had recently taken place which
was doubtless interpreted as an instance of Divine judgment upon
Sabbath-breaking. Clark, in his Looking-Glass for Saints and Sinners, 1657,
published the narrative:—'Not long since, in Bedfordshire, a match at football
being appointed on the Sabbath, in the afternoon whilst two were in the belfry,
tolling of a bell to call the company together, there was suddenly heard a clap
of thunder, and a flash of lightning was seen by some that sat in the church-porch
coming through a dark lane, and flashing in their faces, which must terrified
them, and, passing through the porch into the belfry, it tripped up his heels
that was tolling the bell, and struck him stark dead; and the other that was
with him was so sorely blasted therewith, that shortly after he died also.'
Thus we find that the
church bells ministered to the Book of Sports, to call the company to
Sabbath-breaking. The bell-ringers might come within the same class as those
upon whom the tower at Siloam fell, still it was a most solemn warning, and
accounts for the timidity of so resolute a man as Bunyan. Although he thought
it did not become his newly-assumed religious character, yet his old propensity
drew him to the church tower. At first he ventured in, but took care to stand
under a main beam, lest the bell should fall and crush him; afterwards he would
stand in the door; then he feared the steeple might fall; and the terrors of an
untimely death, and his newly-acquired garb of religion, eventually deterred
him from this mode of Sabbath-breaking. His next sacrifice made at the shrine
of self-righteousness was dancing: this took him one whole year to accomplish,
and then he bade farewell to these sports for the rest of his life.
We are not to conclude from the example of a man who in after-life proved so great and excellent a character, that, under all circumstances, bell-ringing and dancing are immoral. In those days, such sports and pastimes usually took place on the Lord's-day; and however the Church of England might then sanction it, and proclaim by royal authority, in all her churches, the lawfulness of sports on that sacred day, yet it is now universally admitted that it was commanding a desecration of the Sabbath, and letting loose a flood of vice and profaneness. In themselves, on days proper for recreation, such sports may be innocent; but if they engender an unholy thought, or occupy time needed for self-examination and devotion, they ought to be avoided as sinful hindrances to a spiritual life.
27 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 12
'This, for that
instant, did benumb the sinews of my best delights, and did imbitter my former
pleasures to me; but behold it lasted not for before I had well dined, the
trouble began to go off my mind, and my heart returned to its old course. But
O! how glad was I, that this trouble was gone from me, and that the fire was
put out, that I might sin again without control! Wherefore, when I had
satisfied nature with my food, I shook the sermon out of my mind, and to my old
custom of sports and gaming I returned with great delight.
'But the same day, as
I was in the midst of a game at cat, and having struck it one blow from the
hole, just as I was about to strike it the second time, a voice did suddenly
dart from heaven into my soul, which said, "Wilt thou leave thy sins and
go to heaven, or have thy sins and go to hell?" At this I was put to an
exceeding maze; wherefore leaving my cat upon the ground, I looked up to
heaven, and was as if I had, with the eyes of my understanding, seen the Lord
Jesus looking down upon me, as being very hotly displeased with me, and as if
he did severely threaten me with some grievous punishment for these and other
my ungodly practices.
'I had no sooner thus
conceived in my mind, but, suddenly, this conclusion was fastened on my spirit,
for the former hint did set my sins again before my face, that I had been a
great and grievous sinner, and that it was now too late for me to look after
heaven; for Christ would not forgive me, nor pardon my transgressions. Then I
fell to musing upon this also; and while I was thinking on it, and fearing lest
it should be so, I felt my heart sink in despair, concluding it was too late;
and therefore I resolved in my mind I would go on in sin: for, thought I, if
the case be thus, my state is surely miserable; miserable if I leave my sins,
and but miserable if I follow them; I can but be damned, and if I must be so, I
had as good be damned for many sins, as be damned for few.
'Thus I stood in the
midst of my play, before all that then were present: but yet I told them
nothing. But I say, I having made this conclusion, I returned desperately to my
sport again; and I well remember, that presently this kind of despair did so
possess my soul, that I was persuaded I could never attain to other comfort
than what I should get in sin; for heaven was gone already; so that on that I
must not think.'
How difficult is it,
when immorality has been encouraged by royal authority, to turn the tide or to
stem the torrent. For at least four years, an Act of Parliament had prohibited
these Sunday sports. Still the supineness of the justices, and the connivance
of the clergy, allowed the rabble youth to congregate on the Green at Elstow,
summoned by the church bells to celebrate their sports and pastimes, as they
had been in the habit of doing on the Lord's day.[
This solemn warning,
received in the midst of his sport, was one of a series of convictions, by
which he hardened sinner was to be fitted to receive the messages of mercy and
love. In the midst of his companions and of the spectators, Bunyan was struck
with a sense of guilt. How rapid were his thoughts—'Wilt thou leave thy sins
and go to heaven, or have thy sins and go to hell?' With the eye of his
understanding he saw the Lord Jesus as 'hotly displeased.' The tempter suggests
it is 'too, too late' to seek for pardon, and with a desperate resolution which
must have cost his heart the severest pangs, he continued his game. Still the
impression remained indelibly fixed upon his mind.
The next blow which
fell upon his hardened spirit was still more deeply felt, because it was given
by one from whom he could the least have expected it. He was standing at a
neighbour's shop-window, 'belching out oaths like the madman that Solomon
speaks of, who scatters abroad firebrands, arrows, and death'[58] 'after his
wonted manner.' He exemplified the character drawn by the Psalmist. 'As he
clothed himself with cursing like as with his garment: so let it come into his
bowels like water, and like oil into his bones.'
26 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 11
During the Commonwealth, there was substituted, in place of the Common Prayer, A directory for the Public worship of God, and the uniformity which was enjoined in it was like that of the Presbyterians and Dissenters of the present day. The people had assembled, and been exhorted to reverence and humility, and joined the preacher in prayer. He then read portions of Scripture, with or without an exposition, as he judged it necessary, but not so as to render the service tedious. After singing a psalm, the minister prayed, leading the people to mourn under a sense of sin, and to hunger and thirst after the grace of God, in Jesus Christ; an outline or abstract is given of the subject of public prayer, and similar instructions are given as to the sermon or paraphrase.
Immediately after the
sermon, prayer was again offered up, and after the outline that is given of
this devotional exercise, it is noted, 'And because the prayer which Christ
taught his disciples, is not only a pattern of prayer but itself a most
comprehensive prayer, we recommend it also to be used in the prayers of the
Church.' This being ended, a psalm was sung, and the minister dismissed the
congregation with a solemn blessing.[53] Some of the clergy continued the use
of prayers, contained in the liturgy, reciting, instead of reading them—a
course that was not objected to. This was the form of service which struck
Bunyan with such awe and reverence, leaving a very solemn impression upon his
mind, which the old form of common prayer had never produced.
Bunyan was fond of athletic sports, bell-ringing, and dancing; and in these he had indulged, so far as his worldly calling allowed. Charles I, whether to promote Popery—to divert his subjects from political grievances—or to punish the Puritans, had endeavored to drown their serious thoughts in a vortex of dissipation, by re-publishing the Book of Sports, to be used on Sundays. That 'after Divine service our good people be not disturbed, let, or discouraged from dancing, either men or women; archery, leaping, vaulting, or any other such harmless recreations; May games, Whitsun-ales, Morris dances, Maypoles, and other sports.' But this was not all, for every 'Puritan and Precisian was to be constrained to conformity with these sports, or to leave their country.' The same severe penalty was enforced upon every clergyman who refused to read from his pulpit the Book of Sports and to persuade the people thus to desecrate the Lord's-day.
'Many hundred godly ministers were suspended from their ministry, sequestered, driven from their livings, excommunicated, prosecuted in the high commission court, and forced to leave the kingdom for not publishing this declaration.' A little gleam of heavenly light falls upon those dark and gloomy times, from the melancholy fact that nearly eight hundred conscientious clergymen were thus wickedly persecuted. This was one of the works of Laud, who out-bannered Bonner himself in his dreadful career of cruelty while making havoc on the church of Christ. Even transportation for refusing obedience to such diabolical laws was not the greatest penalty; in some cases, it was followed by the death of the offender. The punishments inflicted for nonconformity were accompanied by the most refined and barbarous cruelties. Still many of the learned bowed their necks to this yoke with abject servility: thus, Robert Powell, speaking of the Book of Sports, says, 'Needless is it to argue or dispute for that which authority hath commanded, and most insufferable insolence to speak or write against it.'
These Sunday sports, published by
Charles I, in 1633, had doubtless aided in fostering Bunyan's bad conduct in
his youthful days. In 1644, when The Book of Common Prayer was abolished, an
Act was passed for the better observance of the Lord's-day; all persons were
prohibited on that day to use any wrestling, shooting, bowing, ringing of
bells for pastime, masques, wakes, church-ales, dancing, game, sports or
pastime whatever; and that 'the Book of Sports shall be seized, and publicly
burnt.' During the civil war this Act does not appear to have been strictly
enforced; for, four years after it was passed, we find Bunyan and his dissolute
companions worshipping the priest, clerk, and vestments on a Sunday morning,
and assembling for their Sabbath-breaking sports in the afternoon. It was upon
one of these occasions that a most extraordinary impression was fixed upon the
spirit of Bunyan. A remarkable scene took place, worthy of the pencil of the most
eminent artist. This event cannot be better described than in his own words:—
'One day, amongst all
the sermons our parson made, his subject was, to treat of the Sabbath-day, and
of the evil of breaking that, either with labour, sports, or otherwise; now I
was, notwithstanding my religion, one that took much delight in all manner of
vice, and especially that was the day that I did solace myself therewith;
wherefore I fell in my conscience under his sermons, thinking and believing
that he made that sermon on purpose to show me my evil doing. And at that time
I felt what guilt was, though never before, that I can remember; but then I
was, for the present, greatly loaden therewith, and so went home, when the
sermon was ended, with a great burthen upon my spirit.
25 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 10
The narrative of
Bunyan's progress in his conversion is, without exception, the most astonishing
of any that has been published. It is well calculated to excite the profoundest
investigation of the Christian philosopher. Whence came to those sudden
suggestions, those gloomy fears, those heavenly rays of joy? Much learning
certainly did not make him mad. The Christian dares not attribute his intense
feelings to a distempered brain. Whence came to the invisible power that struck
Paul from his horse? Who was it that scared Job with dreams, and terrified him
with visions? What messenger of Satan buffeted Paul? Who put 'a new song' into
the mouth of David? We have no space in this short memoir to attempt the
drawing a line between convictions of sin and the terrors of a distempered
brain. Bunyan's opinions upon this subject are deeply interesting and are
fully developed in his Holy War. The capabilities of the soul to entertain vast
armies of thoughts, strong and feeble, represented as men, women, and children,
are so great as almost to perplex the strongest understanding. All these
multitudes of warriors are the innumerable thoughts—the strife—in ONE soul.
Upon such a subject an interesting volume might be written. But we must fix our
attention upon the poor tinker who was the subject of this wondrous war.
The tender and wise
efforts of Mrs. Bunyan to reclaim her husband, were attended by the Divine
blessing, and soon led to many resolutions, on his part, to curb his sinful
propensities and to promote an outward reformation; his first effort was
regularly to attend Divine worship.
He says, 'I fell in
very eagerly with the religion of the times, to wit, to go to church twice a day, and that too with the foremost; and there should very devoutly both say
and sing as others did, yet retaining my wicked life; but withal, I was so
overrun with a spirit of superstition, that I adored, and that with great
devotion, even all things, both the high-place, priest, clerk, vestment,
service, and what else belongs to the Church; counting all things holy that
were therein contained, and especially, the priest and clerk most happy, and
without doubt greatly blessed, because they were the servants, as I then thought,
of God, and were principal in the holy temple, to do his work therein. This
conceit grew so strong in little time upon my spirit, that had I but seen a
priest, though never so sordid and debauched in his life,[50] I should find my
spirit fall under him, reverence him, and knit unto him; yea, I thought, for
the love, I did bear unto them, supposing they were the ministers of God, I
could have lain down at their feet, and have been trampled upon by them; their
name, their garb, and work did so intoxicate and bewitch me.'
All this took place
at the time when The Book of Common Prayer, having been said to occasion
'manifold inconveniency,' was, by an Act of Parliament, 'abolished,' and by a
subsequent Act prohibited, under severe penalties, from being publicly used.
The 'manifold inconveniences' to which the Act refers, arose from differences
of opinion as to the propriety of the form which had been enforced, heightened
by the enormous cruelties practiced upon multitudes who refused to use it. Opposition
to the English Liturgy as more combined in Scotland, by a covenant entered
into, June 20, 1580, by the king, lords, nobles, and people, against Popery;
and upon Archbishop Laud's attempt, in 1637, to impose the service-book upon
our northern neighbours, tumults, and bloodshed ensued; until, in 1643, a new
and very solemn league and covenant were entered into, which, in 1645, extended
its influence to England, being subscribed by thousands of our best citizens,
with many of the nobility—' wherein we all subscribe, and each with his own
hands lifted up to the Highest God, doe swear'; that being the mode of taking
an oath, instead of kissing the cover of a book, as is now practiced. The
cruel and intemperate measures of Laud, and the zeal of Charles, for priestly
domination over conscience, may be justly attributed to the wars which desolated
the country, while the solemn league and covenant brought an overwhelming force
to aid the Parliament in redressing the grievances of the kingdom.
24 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 9
The conquerors
marched to Leicester, which surrendered by capitulation. Heath, in his
Chronicle, asserts that 'no life was lost at the retaking of Leicester.' Many
of Bunyan's sayings and proverbs are strongly tinged with the spirit of
Rupert's dragoons—'as we say, blood up to the ears.' 'What can be the meaning
of this (trumpeters), they neither sound boot and saddle, nor horse and away,
nor a charge?' In his allegories when he alludes to fighting, it is with the
sword and not with the musket; 'rub up man, put on thy harness.' 'The father's
sword in the hand of the sucking child is not able to conquer a foe.'
Considering his
singular loyalty, which, during the French Revolution, was exhibited as a
pattern to Dissenters by an eminent Baptist minister; considering also his profligate character and
military sayings, it is very probable that Bunyan was in the king's army in
1645, being about seventeen years of age. It was a finishing school to the
hardened sinner, which enabled him, in his account of the Holy War, so well to
describe every filthy lane and dirty street in the town of Mansoul.
Whether Bunyan left
the army when Charles was routed at the battle of Naseby or was discharged, is
not known. He returned to his native town full of military ideas, which he used
to advantage in his Holy War. He was not reformed, but hardened in sin, and,
although at times alarmed with convictions of the danger of his soul, in
the end, the flesh pleading powerfully, it prevailed; and he made a resolution
to indulge himself in such carnal delights and pleasures as he was accustomed
to, or that fell in his way. 'His neglecting his business, and following gaming
and sports, to put melancholy thoughts out of his mind, which he could not
always do, had rendered him very poor and despicable.'
In this forlorn and miserable state, he was induced, by the persuasion of friends, under the invisible guidance of God, to enter into the marriage state. Such a youth, then only twenty years of age, would naturally be expected to marry some young woman as hardened as himself, but he made a very different choice. His earliest biographer says, with singular simplicity, 'his poverty, and irregular course of life, made it very difficult for him to get a wife suitable to his inclination; and because none that were rich would yield to his allurements, he found himself constrained to marry one without any fortune, though very virtuous, loving, and conformably obedient and obliging, being born of good, honest, godly parents, who had instructed her, as well as they were able, in the ways of truth and saving knowledge.' The idea of his seeking a rich wife is sufficiently droll; he must have been naturally a persuasive lover, to have gained so good a helpmate.
They were not troubled with sending cards, cake, or gloves, nor with the ceremony of receiving the visits of their friends in state; for he says, that 'This woman and I came together as poor as poor might be, not having so much household stuff as a dish or spoon betwixt us both.' His wife had two books, The Plain Man's Pathway to Heaven, and The Practice of Piety; but what was of more importance than wealth or household stuff, she had that seed sown in her heart which no thief could steal. She enticed and persuaded him to read those books. To do this he by application 'again recovered his reading, which he had almost lost.' His wife became an unspeakable blessing to him. She presents a pattern to any woman, who, having neglected the apostolic injunction not to be unequally yoked, finds herself under the dominion of a swearing daredevil.
It affords a lovely proof of the
insinuating benign favour of female influence. This was the more surprising, as
he says, 'the thoughts of religion were very grievous to me,' and when 'books
that concerned Christian piety were read in my hearing, it was as it were a
prison to me.' In spite of all obstacles, his rugged heart was softened by her
tenderness and obedience, he 'keeping on the old course,' she upon every proper
season teaching him how her father's piety secured his own and his family's
happiness. Here was no upbraiding, no snubbing, no curtain lectures; all was
affectionate, amiable mildness. At first, he became occasionally alarmed for
his soul's salvation; then with the thought of having sinned away the day of
grace, he plunged again into sin with greediness; anon a faint hope of mercy
would fill him with fear and trembling. But this leads us to the wondrous
narrative of his new birth.
23 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 8
'With such proofs of his peaceful submission to government in all things that touched not the prerogatives of God; it would have been marvelous indeed if he had taken up arms against his king. His infatuated delight in swearing, and roisterous habits, were ill-suited to the religious restraints of the Parliamentarians, while they would render him a high prize to Rupert's dragoons. Add to this, the remarkable fact, that Leicester was besieged and stormed with terrible slaughter by the king, but not by the army of the Parliament.
The taking of
Leicester by the king in person was attended with great cruelties. The abbey
was burnt by the cavaliers. Rupert's black flag was hoisted on the gate which
had been treacherously given up. Every Scotchman found in the town was
murdered. The mace and town seals were carried off as plunder; and, if the
account given by Thoresby in his History of Leicester is correct, the scene of
carnage was quite enough to sicken Bunyan of a military life. He knew the mode
in which plunder taken from the bodies of the slain was divided by the
conquerors:—
'The king's forces having made their batteries, stormed Leicester; those within made stout resistance, but some of them betrayed one of the gates; the women of the town laboured in making up the breaches, and in great danger. The king's forces having entered the town, had a hot encounter in the market-place; and many of them were slain by shot out of the windows, that they gave no quarter, but hanged some of the committee, and cut others to pieces. Some letters say that the kennels ran down with blood; Colonel Gray the governor, and Captain Hacker, were wounded and taken prisoners, and very many of the garrison were put to the sword, and the town miserably plundered. The king's forces killed divers who prayed quarter, and put divers women to the sword, and other women and children they turned naked into the streets, and many they ravished. They hanged Mr. Reynor and Mr. Sawyer in cold blood; and at Wighton they smothered Mrs. Barlowes, a minister's wife, and her children.'
Lord Clarendon admits
the rapine and plunder, and that the king regretted that some of his friends
suffered with the rest. Humphrey Brown deposed that he was present when the
garrison, having surrendered upon a promise of quarter, he saw the king's
soldiers strip and wound the prisoners, and heard the king say—'cut them more,
for they are mine enemies.' A national collection was made for the sufferers,
by an ordinance bearing date the 28th October, 1645, which states that—' Whereas
it is very well known what miseries befell the inhabitants of the town and
county of Leicester, when the king's army took Leicester, by plundering the
said inhabitants, not only of their wares in their shops, but also all their
household goods, and their apparel from their backs, both of men, women, and
children, not sparing, in that kind, infants in their cradles; and, by violent
courses and tortures, compelled them to discover whatsoever they had concealed or
hid, and after all they imprisoned their persons, to the undoing of the
tradesmen, and the ruin of many of the country.'
Can we wonder that 'the king was abused as a barbarian and a murderer, for having put numbers to death in cold blood after the garrison had surrendered; and for hanging the Parliament's committee, and some Scots found in that town?' The cruelties practiced in the king's presence were signally punished. He lost 709 men on that occasion, and it infused new vigour into the Parliament's army. The battle of Naseby was fought a few days after; the numbers of the contending forces were nearly equal; the royal troops were veterans, commanded by experienced officers; but the God of armies avenged the innocent blood shed in Leicester, and the royal army was cut to pieces; carriages, cannon, the king's cabinet, full of treasonable correspondence, were taken, and from that day he made feeble fight, and soon lost his crown and his life.
22 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 7
In addition to these
mercies recorded by his own pen, one of his friends asserts that he
acknowledged his deep obligations to Divine mercy for being saved when he fell
into an exceeding deep pit, as he was traveling in the dark; for having been
preserved in sickness; and also for providential goodness that such a sinner
was sustained with food and raiment, even to his own admiration.
Bunyan adds, 'Here
were judgments and mercy, but neither of them did awaken my soul to
righteousness'; wherefore I sinned still and grew more and more rebellious
against God, and careless of mine own salvation.'
That such a scape-grace should enter the army can occasion no surprise. His robust, hardy frame, used to exposure in all weathers—his daring courage, as displayed in his perilous dealing with the adder, bordering upon fool-hardiness—his mental depravity and immoral habits, fitted him for all the military glory of rapine and desolation. In his Grace Abounding, he expressly states that this took place before his marriage, while his earliest biographer places this event some years after his marriage, and even argues upon it, as a reason why he became a soldier, that 'when the unnatural civil war came on, finding little or nothing to do to support himself and small family, he, as many thousands did, betook himself to arms.'
The same account states that 'in June 1645, being at the
siege of Leicester, he was called out to be one who was to make a violent
attack upon the town, vigorously defended by the King's forces against the
Parliamentarians, but appearing to the officer who was to command them to be
somewhat awkward in handling his arms, another voluntarily, and as it was
thrust himself into his place, who, having the same post that was designed Mr.
Bunyan, met his fate by a carbine-shot from the wall; but this little or
nothing startled our too secure sinner at that time; for being now in an army
where wickedness abounded, he was the more hardened.'
Thus we find Bunyan
engaged in military affairs. There can be no doubt but that he was a soldier
prior to his marriage, and that he was present at the siege of Leicester; but
it is somewhat strange (if true) that he should have preferred the
Parliamentary to the Royal army. Although this is a question that cannot be
positively decided without further evidence than has yet been discovered, there
are strong reasons for thinking that so loyal a man joined the Royal army, and
not that of the Republicans.
The army into which
Bunyan entered is described as being 'where wickedness abounded,' but,
according to Hume, in this year the Republican troops were generally pious men.
21 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 6
At another time he
dreamed that he was in a pleasant place, jovial and rioting, banqueting and
feasting his senses, when a mighty earthquake suddenly rent the earth, and made
a wide gap, out of which came bloody flames, and the figures of men tossed up
in globes of fire, and falling down again with horrible cries, shrieks, and
execrations, whilst some devils that were mingled with them, laughed aloud at
their torments; and whilst he stood trembling at this sight, he thought the
earth sunk under him, and a circle of flame enclosed him; but when he fancied
he was just at the point to perish, one in white shining raiment descended, and
plucked him out of that dreadful place; whilst the devils cried after him, to
leave him with them, to take the just punishment his sins had deserved, yet he
escaped the danger and leaped for joy when he awoke and found it was a dream.'
Such dreams as these
fitted him in after life to be the glorious dreamer of the Pilgrim's Progress,
in which a dream is told which doubtless embodies some of those which terrified
him in the night visions of his youth.
In the interpreter's house he is 'led into a chamber where there was one rising out of bed, and as he put on his raiment he shook and trembled. Then said Christian, Why doth this man thus tremble? The Interpreter then bid him tell to Christian the reason of his so doing. So he began and said, This night, as I was in my sleep I dreamed, and behold the heavens grew exceeding black; also it thundered and lightened in most fearful wise, that it put me into an agony. So I looked up in my dream, and saw the clouds rack at an unusual rate, upon which I heard a great sound of a trumpet, and saw also a man sit upon a cloud, attended with the thousands of heaven—they were all in flaming fire; also the heavens were in a burning flame. I heard then a voice saying,
"Arise, ye dead, and come to judgment;"
and with that the rocks rent, the graves opened, and the dead that were therein
came forth. Some of them were exceeding glad, and looked upward; and some
sought to hide themselves under the mountains. Then I saw the man that sat upon
the cloud open the book, and bid the world draw near. Yet there was, by reason
of a fierce flame which issued out and came from before him, a convenient
distance betwixt him and them, as betwixt the judge and prisoners at the bar. I
heard it also proclaimed, "Gather together the tares, the chaff, and
stubble, and cast them into the burning lake"; and with that the
bottomless pit opened just whereabout I stood, out of the mouth of which there
came, in an abundant manner, smoke and coals of fire, with hideous noises. It
was also said, "Gather my wheat into the garner"; and with that, I saw
many caught up and carried away into the clouds, but I was left behind. I also
sought to hide, but I could not, for the man that sat upon the cloud
still kept his eye upon me; my sins also came into my mind, and my conscience
did accuse me on every side. Upon that I awoke from my sleep.'
No laboured
composition could have produced such a dream as this. It flows in such
dream-like order as would lead us to infer, that the author who narrates it
had, when a boy, heard the twenty-fifth chapter of Matthew read at church, and
the solemn impression following him at night assisted in producing a dream
which stands, and perhaps will ever stand, unrivaled.
Awful as must have
been these impressions upon his imagination, they were soon thrown off, and the
mad youth rushed on in his desperate career of vice and folly. Is he then left
to fill up the measure of his iniquities? No, the Lord has a great work for him
to do. HIS hand is not shortened that he cannot save. Bunyan has to be prepared
for his work; and if terrors will not stop him, manifested mercies in judgments
are to be tried.
'God did not utterly
leave me, but followed me still, not now with convictions, but judgments; yet
such as were mixed with mercy. For once I fell into a creek of the sea and
hardly escaped drowning. Another time I fell out of a boat into Bedford river,
but mercy yet preserved me alive. Besides, another time, being in the field
with one of my companions, it chanced that an adder passed over the highway, so
I, having a stick in my hand, struck her over the back; and having stunned her,
I forced to open her mouth with my stick, and plucked her sting out with my
fingers; by which act, had not God been merciful unto me, I might by my
desperateness have brought myself to my end.
'This also have I
taken notice of, with thanksgiving. When I was a soldier, I, with others, were
drawn out to go to such a place to besiege it; but when I was just ready to go,
one of the company desired to go in my room, to which, when I had consented, he
took my place; and coming to the siege, as he stood sentinel, he was shot into
the head with a musket bullet, and died.'
20 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 5
At another time he
dreamed that he was in a pleasant place, jovial and rioting, banqueting and
feasting his senses, when a mighty earthquake suddenly rent the earth, and made
a wide gap, out of which came bloody flames, and the figures of men tossed up
in globes of fire and falling down again with horrible cries, shrieks, and
execrations, whilst some devils that were mingled with them, laughed aloud at
their torments; and whilst he stood trembling at this sight, he thought the
earth sunk under him, and a circle of flame enclosed him; but when he fancied
he was just at the point to perish, one in white shining raiment descended, and
plucked him out of that dreadful place; whilst the devils cried after him, to
leave him with them, to take the just punishment his sins had deserved, yet he
escaped the danger and leaped for joy when he awoke and found it was a dream.'
Such dreams as these
fitted him in after life to be the glorious dreamer of the Pilgrim's Progress,
in which a dream is told which doubtless embodies some of those which terrified
him in the night visions of his youth.
In the interpreter's house, he is 'led into a chamber where there was one rising out of bed, and as he put on his raiment he shook and trembled. Then said Christian, Why doth this man thus tremble? The Interpreter then bid him tell to Christian the reason of his so-doing. So he began and said, This night, as I was in my sleep I dreamed, and behold the heavens grew exceeding black; also it thundered and lightened in most fearful wise, that it put me into an agony. So I looked up in my dream, and saw the clouds rack at an unusual rate, upon which I heard a great sound of a trumpet, and saw also a man sit upon a cloud, attended with the thousands of heaven—they were all in flaming fire; also the heavens were in a burning flame. I heard then a voice saying, "Arise, ye dead, and come to judgment;" and with that the rocks rent, the graves opened, and the dead that was therein came forth. Some of them were exceeding glad, and looked upward, and some sought to hide under the mountains. Then I saw the man that sat upon the cloud open the book and bid the world draw near.
Yet there was, by reason
of a fierce flame which issued out and came from before him, a convenient
distance betwixt him and them, as betwixt the judge and prisoners at the bar. I
heard it also proclaimed, "Gather together the tares, the chaff, and
stubble, and cast them into the burning lake"; and with that the
bottomless pit opened just whereabout I stood, out of the mouth of which there
came, in an abundant manner, smoke and coals of fire, with hideous noises. It
was also said, "Gather my wheat into the garner"; and with that I saw
many caught up and carried away into the clouds, but I was left behind. I also
sought to hide, but I could not, for the man that sat upon the cloud
still kept his eye upon me; my sins also came into my mind, and my conscience
did accuse me on every side. Upon that, I awaked from my sleep.'
No laboured
composition could have produced such a dream as this. It flows in such
dream-like order as would lead us to infer, that the author who narrates it
had, when a boy, heard the twenty-fifth chapter of Matthew read at church, and
the solemn impression following him at night assisted in producing a dream
which stands, and perhaps will ever stand, unrivaled.
Awful as must have
been these impressions upon his imagination, they were soon thrown off, and the
mad youth rushed on in his desperate career of vice and folly. Is he then left
to fill up the measure of his iniquities? No, the Lord has great work for him
to do. HIS hand is not shortened that he cannot save. Bunyan has to be prepared
for his work; and if terrors will not stop him, manifested mercies in judgments
are to be tried.
'God did not utterly
leave me, but followed me still, not now with convictions, but judgments; yet
such as were mixed with mercy. For once I fell into a creek of the sea and
hardly escaped drowning. Another time I fell out of a boat into Bedford river,
but mercy yet preserved me alive. Besides, another time, being in the field
with one of my companions, it chanced that an adder passed over the highway, so
I, having a stick in my hand, struck her over the back; and having stunned her,
I forced open her mouth with my stick, and plucked her sting out with my
fingers; by which act, had not God been merciful unto me, I might by my
desperateness have brought myself to my end.
19 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 4
These reminiscences
are alluded to in the prologue of the Holy
War:—
'When Man soul trampled upon things Divine,
And wallowed in filth as doth a swine,
Then I was there, and did rejoice to see
Diabolus and Man soul so agree.'
The Laureate had read
this, and yet considers it the language of a heart that 'never was hardened.'
He says that 'the wickedness of the tinker has been greatly overcharged, and it
is taking the language of self-accusation too literally to pronounce of John
Bunyan, that he was at any time depraved. The worst of what he was in his worst
days is to be expressed in a single word, the full meaning of which no
circumlocution can convey; and which, though it may hardly be deemed
presentable in serious composition, I shall use, as Bunyan himself (no
mealy-mouthed writer) would have used it, had it in his days borne the same
acceptation in which it is now universally understood;—in that word then, he
had been a blackguard.
The
very head and front of his offending
Hath this extent—no more.'
The meaning of the epithet is admirably explained; but what could Dr. Southey imagine possible to render such a character viler in the sight of God, or a greater pest to society? Is there any vicious propensity, the gratification of which is not included in that character? Bunyan's estimate of his immorality and profaneness prior to his conversion was not made by comparing himself with the infinitely Holy One, but he measured his conduct by that of his more moral neighbors. In his Jerusalem Sinner Saved, he pleads with great sinners, the outwardly and violently profane and vicious, that if HE had received mercy, and had become regenerated, they surely ought not to despair, but to seek earnestly for the same grace. He thus describes himself:—' I speak by experience; I was one of those great sin-breeders; I infected all the youth of the town where I was born; the neighbors counted me so, my practice proved me so: wherefore, Christ Jesus took me first; and, taking me first, the contagion was much allayed all the town over.
When God made me sigh, they would hearken, and inquiringly say,
What's the matter with John? When I went out to seek the bread of life, some of
them would follow, and the rest be put into a muse at home. Some of them,
perceiving that God had mercy upon me, came crying to him for mercy too.' Can
anyone, in the face of such language, doubt that he was most eminently a
brand snatched from the fire'; a pitchy burning brand, known and seen as such
by all who witnessed his conduct? He pointedly exemplified the character set
forth by James, 'the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity, set on fire of
hell' (James 3:6). This was as publicly known before his conversion, as the
effects of the wondrous change were openly seen in his Christian career
afterward. He who, when convinced of sin, strained his eyes to see the distant
shining light over the wicket-gate, after he had gazed upon
—'The
wondrous cross
On which the Prince of glory died,'
became a luminous
beacon, to attract the vilest characters to seek the newness of life; and if there
be hope for them, no one ought to despair. Far be it from us to cloud this
light, or to tarnish so conspicuous an example. Like a Magdalene or a thief on
the cross, his case may be exhibited to encourage hope in every returning
prodigal. During this period of his childhood, while striving to harden his
heart against God, many were the glimmerings of light which from time to time
directed his unwilling eyes to a dread eternity. In the still hours of the
night 'in a dream God opened' his ears—the dreadful vision was that 'devils and
wicked spirits labored to draw me away with them.' These thoughts must have
left a deep and alarming impression upon his mind; for he adds, 'of which I
could never be rid.'
The author of his life, published in 1692, who was one of his personal friends, gives the following account of Bunyan's profligacy, and his checks of conscience:—' He himself hath often, since his conversion, confessed with horror, that when he was but a child or stripling, he had but few equals for lying, swearing, and blaspheming God's holy name—living without God in the world; the thoughts of which, when he, by the light of Divine grace, came to understand his dangerous condition, drew many showers of tears from his sorrowful eyes, and sighs from his groaning heart. The first thing that sensibly touched him in this unregenerate state were fearful dreams, and visions of the night, which often made him cry out in his sleep, and alarm the house as if somebody was about to murder him, and being waked, he would start, and stare about him with such a wildness, as if some real apparition had yet remained; and generally, those dreams were about evil spirits, in monstrous shapes and forms, that presented themselves to him in threatening postures as if they would have taken him away, or torn him in pieces.
At some times they seemed to belch flame, at other times a continuous smoke, with horrible noises and roaring. Once he dreamed he saw the face of the heavens, as it were, all on fire; the firmament crackling and shivering with the noise of mighty thunders, and an archangel flew in the midst of heaven, sounding a trumpet, and a glorious throne was seated in the east, whereon sat one in brightness, like the morning star, upon which he, thinking it was the end of the world, fell upon his knees, and, with uplifted hands towards heaven, cried, O Lord God, have mercy upon me! What shall I do, the day of judgment has come, and I am not prepared! When immediately he heard a voice behind him, exceeding loud, saying, Repent.
18 December, 2022
Works of John Bunyan — by John Bunyan and George Offor— INTRODUCTION Part 3
Bunyan's parents do not appear to have checked, or attempted to counteract, his unbridled career of wickedness. He gives no hint of the kind; but when he notices his wife's father, he adds that he 'was counted godly'; and in his beautiful nonsectarian catechism, there is a very touching conclusion to his instructions to children on their behavior to their parents:—' The Lord, if it is his will, convert our poor parents, that they, with us, maybe the children of God.' These fervent expressions may refer to his own parents; and, connecting them with other evidence, it appears that he was not blessed with pious example.
Upon one
occasion, when severely reproved for swearing, he says—' I wished, with all my
heart, that I might be a little child again, that my father might learn me to
speak without this wicked way of swearing.' In his numerous confessions, he
never expresses pain at having, by his vicious conduct, occasioned grief in his
father or mother. From this it may be inferred, that neither his father's
example nor precept had checked this wretched propensity to swearing and that
he owed nothing to his parents for moral training; but, on the contrary, they
had connived at, and encouraged him in, a course of life which made him a curse
to the neighborhood in which he lived.
In the midst of all
this violent depravity, the Holy Spirit began the work of regeneration in his
soul—a long, a solemn, yea, an awful work—which was to fit this poor debauched
youth for purity of conduct—for communion with heaven—for wondrous usefulness as
a minister of the gospel—for patient endurance of sufferings for righteousness'
sake—for the writing of works which promise to be a blessing to the Church in
all ages—for his support during his passage through the black river which has
no bridge—to shine all bright and glorious, as a star in the firmament of
heaven. 'Wonders of grace to God belong.'
During the period of his open profligacy, his conscience was ill at ease; at times the clanking of Satan's slavish chains in which he was hurrying to destruction, distracted him. The stern reality of a future state clouded and embittered many of those moments employed in gratifying his baser passions. The face of the eventful times in which he lived was rapidly changing; the trammels were loosened, which, with atrocious penalties, had fettered all free inquiry into religious truth. Puritanism began to walk upright; and as the restraints imposed upon Divine truths were taken off, in the same proportion restraints were imposed upon impiety, profaneness, and debauchery. A ringleader in all wickedness would not long continue without reproof, either personally, or as seen in the holy conduct of others.
Bunyan very properly attributed to a gracious God, those
checks of conscience which he so strongly felt even while he was apparently
dead in trespasses and sins. 'The Lord, even in my childhood, did scare and
affright me with fearful dreams, and did terrify me with dreadful visions.' 'I
often wished that there had been no hell, or that I had been a devil to torment
others.' A common childish but demoniac idea. His mind was as 'the troubled
sea, when it cannot rest, whose waters cast up mire and dirt.' 'A while after,
these terrible dreams did leave me; and with more greediness, according to the
strength of nature, I did let loose the reins of my lusts, and delighted in all
transgression against the law of God.' 'I was the very ringleader of all the
youth that kept me company, into ALL MANNER of vice and ungodliness.'
Dr. Southey and others have attempted to whiten this Blackmore, but the veil that they throw over him is so transparent that it cannot deceive those who are in the least degree spiritually enlightened. He alleges that Bunyan, in his mad career of vice and folly, 'was never so given over to a reprobate mind,' as to be wholly free from compunctions of conscience. This is the case with every depraved character, but he goes further when he asserts that 'Bunyan's heart never was hardened.'
This is directly opposed to his description of himself:—'I found within me a great desire to take my fill of sin, still studying what sin was yet to be committed; and I made as much haste as I could to fill my belly with its delicates, lest I should die before I had my desire.' He thus solemnly adds, 'In these things, I protest before God, I lie not, neither do I feign this sort of speech; these were really, strongly, and with all my heart, my desires; the good Lord, whose mercy is unsearchable, forgive me my transgressions.' The whole of his career, from childhood to manhood, was, 'According to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience' (Eph 2:2).