A Warning Against Hardness of Heart - Spurgeon

Delivered by C. H. Spurgeon on  March 19th, 1865,

"But exhort one another daily, while it is called today; lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin." Hebrews 3:13

The children of Israel in their coming out of Egypt, and in their forty years sojourn in the wilderness, represented the visible Church of the living God; not the secret and elect body of the redeemed, but the professing company of the outward Church. They were very prone to the great sin of unbelief. They believed in God after a fashion while they saw his wonders, but the moment they were brought into straits or difficulties, they at once began to doubt the power or Jehovah, and to cast off all reverence for his authority. Hence they fell into another sin which at last fastened on them so as to become a part of their nature- they became stiff-necked, obstinate, rebellious, perverse, and hard of heart. They would not learn, although their lesson-book had miracles for its pictures. Their hearts became so hard that although they saw all the great things which God did for them, they despised the pleasant land, and were ready at times for the sake of the flesh-pots of Egypt, to wear again the yoke of Pharaoh, and to die the inglorious death of slaves. Such, also, are the great sins of the Christian Church - unbelief the root, and obstinacy the fruit. Brethren and sisters, if we know our own hearts, we must confess that unbelief is a sin which does very easily beset us, and that our obstinacy may well provoke the Lord to anger.

We rejoice in God while the rocks run with rivers, and while the daily manna drops about our tents; but when the fiery serpent bites us, or the wells are bitter, or our comforts are in any way interfered with, we begin to distrust and to suspect the faithfulness of God; and, as the result of this, there is an obstinacy about us which often inclines us to stand out against the plain precepts of God, because, forsooth, in the judgment of our unbelief, obedience might lead us into trouble, and disobedience might make our path smooth. Oh that it were not, too sadly true that God's people are liable to be overtaken by the worst of sins! Egypt itself did not produce worse sins than those which provoked the Lord to anger in the camp of Israel; and to this day the Church has some in it who defile her with all the sins of the world. I do not mean to insinuate that the Church of God is not infinitely to be preferred to the world in character; God forbid that I should slander the fair bride of Christ, she is as much superior to the world as the curtains of Solomon excel the smoke blacked tents of Kedar; but who dares deny that there are specimens to be found of the worst of sins occurring among true believers, just as in the most carefully tended garden there will spring up here and there some of the most noxious weeds- not that the weeds are permitted to smother the whole garden and kill the flowers, but that their coming there while men sleep, is an indication of what the soil is, and a plain manifestation that although the garden is very different from the piece of waste ground on the other side of the wall, yet it differs not in nature, but owes all its superiority to the culture of the husbandman, even as the saints owe all their excellence above the very chief of sinners, to the guardian care and omnipotent grace of the great lover of souls.

It seems, dear friends, that it is really necessary to warn God's people, although they have received the new nature, and are partakers of the adoption, against being hardened in heart through the deceitfulness of sin, and that there is a machinery provided by which the saints may be preserved from this great evil. "Exhort one another daily, lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin."

We will talk together thus this morning. First, we shall dwell for a season upon the hardening effect of sin upon men, whether saints or sinners. Then we shall show the peculiar power by which sin hardens, namely, through its deceitfulness. Then we will consider the remedy which we are to use with others  —  "Exhort one another daily." But what if we should be diseased ourselves with this same hardness of heart? Then it will be needful for us to have a few words concerning what to do for ourselves, if we have to complain of a growing insensibility of Spirit, as I am afraid some of us may most justly do.

I. First, then, dear friends, THE HARDENING CHARACTER OF SIN. This is matter of experience. The first sin which came into the world hardened man's heart in a most terrific manner, so that he dared to excuse himself and even to charge God as being indirectly the author of his sin, by giving him the woman. No sooner had Adam tasted of the forbidden fruit, than a stony hardness came upon his moral nature; the heart of sensitive flesh was suddenly petrified, and became hard unfeeling stone; he no longer shrank from the thought of sin, but tried to hide himself from the presence of his best friend. He felt his nakedness in some degree, but that which made him naked he did not lament, or even confess before his God. He would never have been content with an apron of fig leaves, if he had known the full measure of his degradation. His unborn children in that dread hour participated in his fall, and are now born into the world with a stone in their hearts. Man's heart, naturally, is like that of Leviathan, of which the Lord says, "It is as firm as a stone, yes, hard as a piece of the nether millstone"  —  the lower stone of the two in the handmill was always chosen on account of its peculiar hardness. Still, hard as the heart is by nature, it may grow harder by practice and by association with sin, even as Zechariah writes of sinners in his day, "Yes, they made their hearts as an adamant stone, lest they should hear the law" (Zechariah 7:12).

There is no doubt whatever that living among sinners has a hardening tendency upon believers You cannot walk about in this great lazar-house, without receiving some contagion. Though you were pure in heart, unless you had the absolute perfection and Godhead of Christ Jesus to protect you, the prince of this world would make you his prey. It is hard to dwell in so foul a world as this without contracting some impurity. Those black coals which fill this earthly cellar if they will not burn us, will at least blacken us. When so many fires of sin are pouring forth their smoke, the whitest of linen cannot escape the falling black soot. If "the thought of foolishness is sin," and we have divine authority for so judging, then even to think of sin exercises a polluting influence. Can I read a description of another man's sin without getting my heart hardened?

I question if reading the daily reports of crime in the police news is not a very fertile cause of sin. Great crimes usually produce their like in congenial winds, and even in the purest hearts their recital cannot but have an injurious effect. The tree of knowledge of good and evil bears dangerous fruit- it were well if we restrained our curiosity, and left foul deeds alone, unknown, unread by us. What good can come from turning over the foul dunghill of crime? Let those traverse our sewers whose business it is to do so. Would it not be better for the most of us to keep out of them. Those who are called in providence to deal daily with the coarser sins had need to set a special watch over themselves lest they fall by little and little.

Let me here remark that the sins of God's people are peculiarly operative in this manner. If I see a drunkard intoxicated, I am simply shocked at him, but I am not likely to imitate his example. But if I see the same vice in a man whom I respect, and whose example has hitherto been to me the guide of my life, I may be greatly grieved at first, but the tendency of my mind will be to make an excuse for him; and when one has succeeded in framing a plausible excuse for the sin of another, it is very natural to use it on one's own behalf. Association with inconsistent Christians has been the downfall of many young believers. The devil delights to use God's own birds as a decoy for his nets. "I could not have thought it," says the young Christian, "that men whom I esteemed as saints would have acted so." "Well, well," is the next reflection, "if these are good men, and go to heaven, and yet act so ill, then I need not be so precise." And thus, by a course of reasoning which sin makes as easy as casting up accounts by a ready reckoner, we arrive at the conclusion, that perhaps what we avoided as a sin, may have been no sin at all, and we therefore indulge in it without stint, and step by step come down to the level of this evil generation. He who handles sharp-edged tools, is apt to cut his fingers, and none the less so because the knife is made of the best steel. Let us walk warily among men, like a man with naked feet when going over thorny ground, lest our hurt be grievous.

I am fearful that even preaching against sin may have an injurious effect upon the preacher. I frankly confess, my brethren, that there is a tendency with those of us who have to speak upon these themes, to treat them professionally, rather than to make application of them to ourselves; and thus we lose our dread of evil in some degree, just as young doctors soon lose their tender nervousness in the dissecting-room. We are compelled in our office to see ten thousand things which at first are heart-breakers to us. In our young ministry, when we meet with hypocrisy and inconsistency, we are ready to lie down and die; but the tendency in after years is to take these terrible evils as matters of course. Worldliness, covetousness, and carnality, shock us most at the outset of our work. Is not this a sad sign that even God's ministers may feel the hardening effect of sin? I daily feel that the atmosphere of earth has as much a tendency to harden my heart as to harden plaster which is newly spread upon the wall. And unless I am baptized anew with the Spirit of God, and constantly stand at the foot of the cross, reading the curse of sin in the crimson hieroglyphics of my Savior's dying agonies, I shall become as steeled and insensible as the mass of professors already are.

I cannot enter at length into the whole matter, but let me trace the gradual process of hardening of heart which may take place in a measure in a true Christian; but in its full extent in the mere professor whose religion lacks the inward vital principle. You must understand that the hardening of a tender conscience is a gradual process, something like the covering of a pond with ice on a frosty night. At first you can scarcely see that freezing is going on at all. There are certain signs which a thoroughly practiced eye may be able to detect as prognostics of ice, but the most of us would see nothing. By and bye, there is ice, but it would scarcely support a pin. If you should place a needle upon it ever so gently, it would fall through. In due time you perceive a thin coating which might sustain a pebble, and later a child trips merrily over it. And if old winter holds his court long enough, it may be that a loaded wagon may be driven over the frozen lake, or a whole army may march without fear across the stream. There may be no rapid congelation at any one moment, and yet the freezing is complete enough in the end. Apostates and great backsliders do not reach their worst at one bound. The descent to hell is sometimes a precipice, but far oftener a smooth and gentle slope.

It would be hard to find out in the worst of men exactly when they were utterly given up to judicial blindness. It is often a long and laborious process by which conscience is completely seared. This dreadful work usually begins thus, the man's first carefulness and tenderness departs. When you were, first converted, you felt afraid to put one foot down before another, for fear you should go astray. You scarcely ever ventured from your house without a anxiety to be kept by the grace of God. You used to pray in the morning with great ardor and earnestness that not a thought might be awry, not one single word amiss; and, when business was over at night, you felt uneasy, lest in anything however trivial, you might have injured your profession and grieved the Spirit of God.

Well do I recollect when I was the subject of excessive tenderness  —  some people called it "morbid sensibility." How I shuddered and shivered at the very thought of sin which then appeared exceedingly sinful. I would to God I could always feel as I then did. O believer, your new-born character was then white as the lily, and the smallest grain of dust would show upon it. Your life was bright and shining, and the least speck would be discovered, and you yourself were like the sensitive plant, the slightest touch of sin sent a thrill of horror through every fibre of your soul. But it is not so now, at least not to the same admirable degree. It may be you can hear talk to which formerly you would have closed your ears; you can tolerate sins which once you would have shunned as though they were deadly serpents. Your life is somewhat careless now; great sins you avoid right heedfully, but secret sin gives you little or no concern. The departure of that blessed sensibility of soul which marks the new birth, is one very serious mark of declension. It may not seem a great evil to have less abhorrence of evil, but this truly is the egg from which the worst mischief may come. Hear me attentively, O my brother, to whom this message is directed, when I rebuke you in the words of the Savior in the Revelation, "Nevertheless I have somewhat against you, because you have left your first love."

The next distressing sign of growing hardness is increasing neglect or laxity of private devotion, without any corresponding shock of the spiritual sensibilities on account of it. The daily prayer will become shorter and shorter, if not irregular. Occasionally the period allotted to the reading of the Word will be given to business or worldly pleasure, and perhaps frequently forgotten and neglected. It may peradventure have happened at the first that on some occasion we could not conveniently read the Scriptures according to our habit and our prayers were necessarily shortened, but then we sought to make up for the loss at the first opportunity, and we felt like men who having been cut short at their meals, must needs eat the more freely next time. But now I am afraid these things become common with some professors, and they scarcely care to invent an excuse for their slackness in divine things. O what poor pleas do some men offer for deserting their closets! How unjustly may unread Bibles accuse those pretenders to grace who treat them so ill! Alas, brethren, we may look each other in the face and few of us can plead "Guiltless." Divine Spirit, help us to awake out of sleep, and to shake off this deadly lethargy.

Another symptom of increasing callousness of heart, is the fact that hidings of the Savior's face do not cause that acute and poignant sorrow which they produced in former times. Ah, my soul recollects when she walked in the full blaze of Jesus' love; when the very thought of his turning his face away seemed like the chill blast of winter nipping the summer-flowers of my soul. Then I sang  —

"Your shining face can cheer, 
 This dungeon where I dwell 
 It is paradise if you are here, 
 If you depart it's hell."

I have sometimes walked in darkness, and have seen no light; and I confess deep shame and profound sorrow that I have occasionally been half indifferent whether Jesus shone forth or no. The spouse who fondly loves her husband longs for his return, if he is absent; a long protracted separation from him is a semi-death to her spirit. Likewise with souls who love the Savior much-they must see his face, they cannot bear that he should be away upon the mountains of Bether, and no more hold communion with them. A child that is full of love to its parent cannot endure a frown. An angry pat is heavy, a stroke cuts to the very heart. A reproaching look, a glance of rebuke, an uplifted finger will be grievous to good and loving children, who fear to offend their tender father, and are only happy in his smile.

Oh, beloved, it was so once with you. A text of Scripture, a threatening, a touch of the rod of affliction, and you went to your Father's feet, crying, "Show me wherefore you contend with me?" Is it so now? Are you content to follow Jesus afar off? Content to be a wanderer from your Father's house? Can you contemplate suspended communion with Christ without alarm? Can you bear to have your Beloved walking contrary to you, because you walk contrary to him? Have your sins separated between you and your God, and is your heart at rest? O my beloved brother, let me affectionately and even tearfully warn you, for it is a grievous token of hardness of heart when we can live contentedly without the present enjoyment of the Savior's face.

Still further, when the soul is hardened to this extent, it is probable that sin will no longer cause such grief as it once did. Brother, you remember how you humbled yourself before God with many fears, when in your former days you felt that you had made a slip in your conversation. You could not sleep that night. Even that precious promise, which you tried to lay hold of, could hardly quiet your agitated mind. You bemoaned yourself most piteously, crying out upon your bed, "I have dishonored the Lord who bought me, I have been false to my profession and my love to Jesus."

Your spirit had no rest even on the next day, nor could time assuage your bitterness of grief; it was only when the Savior had by his sweet consolations and the application of his precious blood effectually purged your conscience, that your soul at last had rest. My brother, it may be you have lately sinned far worse than you did then, but you do not ache half so severely. Your life is not so pure as it once was, but still your heart is quite as peaceful, for an evil spirit whispers, "Peace, peace, where there is no peace."

Dr. Preston tells us of a professor, who on one occasion was found drunk; and when much depressed on account of his folly, the devil said to him by way of temptation, "Do it again, do it again," for said he, "the grief you feel about it now, you will never feel any more if you commit the sin again." Dr. Preston says that the man yielded to the temptation, and from that time he never did feel the slightest regret at his drunkenness, and lived and died a confirmed sot, though formerly he had been a very high professor. Take special heed of the second sin if you have already fallen into the first, for that second fall may most effectually prevent your repenting and returning to the right way, for habit will take you as in an iron net, and hold you fast to be dragged down with other hypocrites like you, to the lowest depths of hell. It is a sad sign of coming declension, nay, of decline already come, when we can talk of sin lightly, make excuses for it, or make jokes about it; when we can see it in others without sorrow, and in ourselves without the greatest shame.

The next stop in this ladder, down, down, down to destruction, is that sin thus causing less grief, is indulged in more freely. The man had fallen the first time, the second time he deliberately lies down. The first time he was overtaken in a fault, the second time he overtakes the fault and runs after the sin. The first time he was a victim, the second time he is most willingly given up to it. The first time he drank the cup by mistake, or by a kind of compulsion, but the second time he comes to a feast like that of Ahasuerus, where none do compel, and yet he rejoices to be a ringleader in rioting. First he sipped, but now, like the ox, he drinks by the bucketful. At first he carried only a spark in his bosom, but now he bears a whole bucket of burning coals and cries that it is sport. The man may not be ripe enough yet for outward sins under the immediate eye of the world  —  the probability is that he keeps his iniquities private. He eats the bread of sin in secret.

He drinks, but no one calls him drunkard, because it is done at home. He commits lust, but no one charges him with it, because he carefully conceals his tracks, and indulges himself only when he is out of sight of his fellows. He robs in business, but no one can detect it; perhaps even the ledger does not show it  —  there is a particular way of making ends meet in dishonesty, by which a tradesman may be a gross thief, and continue to be so, and yet by putting a gloss on matters, can maintain his reputation, and be considered honest. Into such a state of heart I fear that even some of God's children may for a time be allowed to fall, but the far greater probability is that those who descend so low are hypocrites, and know not the grace of God in truth. I pray God we may never prove by experience how nearly an heir of heaven may become like a child of wrath.

After this there is still a greater hardening of heart  —  the man comes to dislike rebukes. He has sinned so long, and yet he has been held in such respect in the Christian Church, that if you give half a hint about his sin, he looks at you with a sharp look as if you were insulting him; he is not to be talked to or spoken with  —  he has been taken for a flaming professor so many years that he is not to be suspected now. You may rebuke the sins of the congregation and he will be gratified if you do not make too particular an application. You may declaim against his sin in public, but woe unto the friend who shall be daring enough to give a private admonition. The more a man loves his sin and needs rebuke, the more heartily will he hate the person who, with the best of motives, lays it at his door. Mark this word, if this hardening work goes on, the day at last comes to such a man that the Word of God loses all effect upon him, whether he reads it or hears it, it ceases to be an accusing voice any longer. Rather he finds a song of lullaby in it, and rocked in the cradle of his sin, he sleeps on to his own eternal ruin.

You say, "Can a child of God come as far as this?" I believe not, my brethren, but I am speaking now of professors at large; professors may. Professors have at last learned to sleep over the mouth of hell, and dream of heaven while damnation is denounced upon them. I fear that some here are as easy under the thunders of God's law as the blacksmith's dog under the sound of his master's hammer with the sparks flying about him. Some of you have heard the gospel so long and have made a profession of being saved so long, that being still unconverted, there is now little hope of you. The gospel has no power over you, you know it so well and love it so little. If your character could be photographed, you would not acknowledge it. If we preach against hypocrisy, hypocrites say, "Admirable! admirable!" If we deal out threatenings against secret sin, secret sinners feel a little twinge, but forget it all and say, "An excellent discourse." They have hardened their neck against God's Word, have made their brows like flints, and their hearts adamant stones, and now they might just as well stay away from the house of God as not, for there is but little hope that the Word will ever be blest to them, their soul has become hardened through the deceitfulness of sin. And yet would I have them keep from the means of grace? No, for with God nothing is impossible; the sovereign grace of God may yet step in, and he who has power to heal may yet in the mighty majesty of his love, speak to the heart of stone, and make it gush forth with rivers of repentance like the rock in the wilderness of old.

II. We come, in the second place, to notice THE PECULIAR POWER WHICH LIES IN SIN TO HARDEN THE HEART. It is the deceitfulness of sin. The heart is deceitful, and sin is deceitful; and when these two deceitful ones lay their heads together to make up a case, there is no wonder if man, like a silly dove, is taken in their net. One of the first ways in which sin deceives the professor is by saving, "You see no hurt has come of it. The thing is hid: nobody has mentioned it to the Church-officers; it is not, known among the members, in fact, nobody has heard it  —  you may as well enjoy yourself as not. You are not doing any mischief  —  if there is anything wrong it is confined to yourself. Really," says sin, "I cannot see that you are any the worse. You preached quite as well last Sunday; you prayed quite as well at the prayer meeting and as far as the family altar is concerned, there was not much difference there —  evidently sin has not hurt you: do it again; do it again." Forgetting that the immediate results of sin are not always apparent in this world, and that if hardness of heart is not apparent it is all the more real; for if a man could perceive the hardness or his own heart, it would be pretty good evidence that it was somewhat softened.

Then sin will whisper next, "This would be sin in other people, but it is not in you. You see you were placed in a peculiar position; there is indulgence for you which could not be accorded to other men- you are young," says sin, "nobody could accuse you if you did go a little rashly to work  —  if you were all older professor it would be very wrong." Then if it is an old man who is to be deceived, sin will cry, "You must take care of yourself; you need more indulgence than others."

If a man be in private life, sin will then suggest, "It does not matter in you; it would be wrong in a deacon, or any other Church officer, but nobody knows it in your case." If it is some person in high repute, then sin whispers, "Your character is so well established, it will bear it." There is a way in which you can look at things and see them as they are not- sin knows how to use the distorting glass so that a man will turn round on this side and condemn his fellow for a sin, and call him some black name, and then he will turn to the other side and commit the same sin himself, and, like the adulterous woman in the Proverbs, he will wipe his mouth and say "I have done no wickedness." Sin, if it cannot deceive in this way, will beguile its victim by insinuating, "Now this is a dangerous thing for others to do, but in your case, you have so much prudence, and have acquired so much experience, that you can stop when you reach a certain point. I know," says sin, "young So-and-so was ruined by frequenting such and such places, but you may go in and out of the same doors, because you have so much discretion. It would be dangerous to expose your son to such a temptation, and of course you would not like the Church should know that you go there, but still, really you are a person so well established, and you know the world so thoroughly, that you may do without the slightest hurt what others may not even dream of."

It is a great and grievous lie as we ought to know, that sin can ever be touched without injury, but yet this suffices for many  —  "I will go to the verge of the precipice, I will look down, I will get the delicious feeling of the sublimity of danger, and then will turn back. I will mix up with bad company sufficiently to know its evils- I would not go over the line for all the world, I shall be sure to stop just on this side of it." Such boasters remind one of that simple story of the lady who needed a coachman. When three applied, she had them in one by one. "Well," said she to the first, "How near can you drive to danger?" "Madam," said he, "I believe I could drive within a foot without fear." "You will not do for me" said she. To the second she said, "How near could you drive to danger?" "Within a hair's breadth, Madam," said he, "and yet, you would be perfectly safe." "You will not suit me," said she. The third came in, and when asked the same question "How near could you drive to danger?" He said, "Please Ma'am, I never tried, I always drive as far off as ever I can." The Christian should always act in such a way.

Some, through the deceitfulness of sin, are always trying how near they can go to the edge, so as not to fall over; how near they can sail to the rock, and not dash upon it —  how much sin they can indulge in, and yet remain respected Church members. Shame on us, that any of us should be guilty of such tampering with that accursed thing which slew the Lord of glory.

Again, sin will sometimes have the impudence to say, "It is very easy to repent of it. If you have once plunged into the mire, you can at any time see the evil of it, and you have only to repent, and straightway there is forgiveness." This vile traitor is even dastardly enough to take the doctrines of grace, and turn them into a reason for sin. The old serpent hisses out, as none but the devil dare do, "God will not cast you off; he never casts away his people. He can soon visit you in mercy, and lift you up to the highest state of spirituality; though you may have fallen into the lowest condition of degradation. You run no risks as others would; for the eternal purpose of God is engaged to keep you from final perdition, and therefore you may drink the deadly thing, and it shall not hurt you; and tread upon serpents, and they shall not bite you." "Their damnation is just," says the apostle, of those who use the doctrines of grace its an argument for a license to sin.

The child of God scorns the thought of making the love of God

a reason for sin. When a little boy was tempted to steal from an orchard, the others said to him, "You my safely do it; your father is so fond of you, that he will not beat you." "No, no," said the little fellow, "that is the very reason why I would not go a thieving, for I should grieve my father, who is so kind and so good to me." Yet the deceitfulness of sin is such that it will turn the strongest motive for holiness into an argument for rebellion against God. My dear friends, I feel the weight of this subject pressing down my own heart; and for that very reason I cannot bring out these truths as I would desire, so as to make them flash into your faces. But I do feel that it must be true of some of you who make a profession of religion, that sin, through its deceitfulness, is tampering with your spirits, trying to make you traitors to God, seeking, if it possibly can, to pervert your mind from hatred of sin, and from true love to Jesus Christ.

III. I pass on, however, to hint at THE REMEDY WHICH IS PROVIDED IN THE TEXT FOR US TO USE WITH OTHERS. "Exhort one another," and we are told when to do it  —  "daily," and when to begin to do it  —  "while it is called today." Doubtless many professors would be saved from gross sins if mutual exhortation were more commonly practiced in the churches of God in the power of the Holy Spirit. This duty belongs primarily to the pastor and to Church officers. We are set in the church to see after the good of the people, and it is our business both in public and in private, as far as we have opportunity, to exhort daily; and especially where we see any coldness creeping over men, where there begins to be a decline in the ways of God, it is our duty to be most earnest in exhortation.

The duty also belongs to you all, "Exhort one another daily." Parents should be careful concerning their children in this matter. You act not the part of a true father unless you see that your son upon the slightest inconsistency he receives a gentle word of rebuke from you. You matrons in Israel, you are not true mothers of the Church unless you look after the young sisters to keep them out of sin. Sunday-school teachers, this is peculiarly your work with reward to your own classes. In this Church, so many have been brought out of the school into the Church, that I may insist the more earnestly upon this duty. Watch over your children, not only that they may be converted, but that after being converted they may be as watered gardens, not withering plants, but all the graces of the Spirit coming to perfection through your care. Here is work for the elders among us. You whose grey heads betoken years of experience, and whose years of experience ought to have given you wisdom and knowledge- you may use the superiority which age affords you to offer a word of exhortation, lovingly and tenderly to the young. You can speak as those of us who are younger cannot speak, for you can tell what you have tasted and have handled; perhaps you can even tell where you have ached by reason of your own faults and follies. All of you without exception, whether you be rich or poor, see to each others' souls! Do not say, "Am I my brother's keeper?" but seek you your brother's good for edification.

I do hope there will be a larger degree of sociality among the members of this Church than ever, although hitherto I have had no cause of complaint. Some Churches never can practice mutual exhortation because the members do not know each other- the members are lumps of ice floating about, huge ice-blocks without connection with one another- it ought not to be so. The very fact of Church membership, drinking of the same cup, eating of the same bread, it seems to me, entitles every man to admonish, and to be admonished, nay, makes it the imperative duty of every such person to see that he cares for the soul of his fellow. I would not abolish social distinctions, God forbid! they ever must exist, I believe, at least until the Lord comes; but in the Church of God, membership and brotherhood should, at least when you come together here, override all social distinctions.

And as in Cromwell's army, the private might often be heard around the camp fire talking to the major, and the subordinate taking it upon him to rebuke the colonel, so should it be among us- we should feel that we are one in Christ Jesus, that while we regard distinctions among men in civil life, yet in spiritual things we so care for each other's good, and so desire the edification of the entire body of Christ, that we watch over one another carefully and prayerfully, and exhort one another daily. In such a Church as this there is peculiar need of it. What can we, a handful of Church officers, do among three thousand of you. If you do not exercise oversight over one another, what can be done? I thank God the duty is not altogether neglected, but I would stimulate you to a greater diligence in the exercise of it.

You know of someone perhaps, who is backsliding- do not tell anybody else, go privately yourself to him. You know of a sister whose spiritual life is in a decline- do not talk to your neighbors, or even at first communicate with us about it, but labor to get your own heart right, and then seek to restore such an one in the spirit of meekness, remembering, yourself lest you also be tempted. If we do not do this, we shall as a Church suffer great dishonor. It is unavoidable in so many but that we should be troubled with some hypocrites. How can our Church be kept right, instrumentally, except by much watchfulness? We do not wish to be dishonored, we do not desire by great falls to grieve the name of Christ; then let us watch over one another. It is so pleasant and so blessed to restore a brother from the error or his ways, that I can offer you no greater reward than these two —  to screen the name of Christ from shame, and to have the pleasure of saving a soul from death and covering a multitude of sins.

IV. Lastly, SUPPOSE THIS TO BE THE CASE WITH ANY ONE OF US, WHAT THEN? We cannot very well, as a rule, ask a brother to exhort us when we feel conscious of insensibility, although it were well if some dear friend could be trusted to give us every now and then a solemn admonition. Some of us are in such a position that we are not very likely to be exhorted, we are keepers of the vineyard, and have none who would take upon themselves to admonish us. Our enemies, however, very ably supply the lack, for they often tell us very profitable, but very unpleasant truths, which do us a deal of good, and they are never restrained by any fear of hurting our feelings. We have great reason to thank God for some men's enmity, it was the only way in which they could serve us. Failing this- and private Christians miss this bitter medicine  —  what is to be done? Suppose we have begun to flag? what is to be done? Shall I say "Suppose?" come, pass the question round, dear friends. Is it not true with too many of us, that we are growing careless and insensible! Do I not hear some honest hearts cry, "There is no supposition in the case, we have already gone back." Public services to some of you have grown dull, compared with what they used to be, and yet the preacher is the same! Prayer meetings you scarce attend, or if you are there, your hearts are not on fire with vehement longings after your God.

Private prayer drags heavily. Bible reading is almost given up. Communion with Christ is becoming a thing of the past. Holy joys and divine ecstasies, are things which you have read of and heard about, but do not enjoy yourselves! May it not be so with you! I feel sometimes as if I could be cut in my heart with a sword, I would bless the sword, so long as I could but ache and bleed under it. Oh, it is a horrible thing, an accursed thing, to abide in a state of spiritual insensibility! Oh, for heartbreaking! To have a heart broken thoroughly would be a blessing- yes, to be driven to despair might be an enviable thing, rather than not to feel at all. I will not, therefore, say "Suppose," but I will say it is so with a great many. Then what had we better do?

My brethren, let us labor to feel what an evil thing this is- little love to our own dying Savior, little joy in our precious Jesus, little fellowship with our spiritual and well beloved husband, our Lord, our covenant Head. Be ashamed and be confounded for your own ways, O house of Israel. Cover your faces, men and brethren, and let boasting be put away. Put on sackcloth! Heap ashes on your heads! Hold a true Lent in your souls, while you sorrow over your hardness of heart. Do not stop at sorrow! Remember where you first received salvation. Go at once to the cross. There, and there only, can you got your spirit quickened. There hangs the Savior! There was life in him ten years, twenty years ago, when you first looked. There is life in him still. If your experience should seem to you to have been a delusion, and your faith to have been presumption, Christ is a Savior still. He came into the world to save sinners, and if you are not a saint, you are a sinner; go to him as such. Let us, my brethren, begin again. Let us go to the starting point. Let us lay again the fundamentals. Let us sing  —

"Just as I am, without one plea, 
But that your blood was shed for me, 
And that you bid me come to thee, 
O Lamb of God, I come!"

No matter how hard, how insensible, how dead we may have become, let us go again in all the rags, and poverty, and defilement of our natural condition, and throw ourselves flat on our faces before his mighty cross! "With all my sin, and all my hardness of heart," let the believer say, "I do believe that Jesus died for me." Let him clasp that cross, let him look into those languid eyes, let him bathe in that fountain filled with blood. This alone will bring back to him his first love; this will restore the ancient holiness of his faith, and the former tenderness of his soul!

To you who think that you never were converted and probably never were, who have grown very hard, who fear you never could by any possibility melt in repentance, I give this exhortation, O may the Holy Spirit enable you to obey it. Come to Jesus you vilest of men! Laboring ones, heavy laden ones, come to Jesus! Black, foul, filthy, hard-hearted ones, come to Jesus! He is able to save unto the uttermost them that come unto God by him. We are not in hell yet, the iron door has not grated on its hinges, the dread bolt has not yet slid into its socket. There is hope for there is life, there is hope for there is a promise, there is hope for there hangs the Savior  —  there is hope for me, for you, for both of us, if we go humbly to the mercy seat, and take Christ to be our all in all. God help us to do it for Jesus' name's sake. Amen

Faith - Part 10/10

Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that comes to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.”

Faith is not as easy as we think it is. It is so easy for us to criticize the Israelites for not trusting God when they could not find water, just three days after they have had such great experiences with God. The only way we can understand why it was so hard for them to do something that appear so simple is to walk a mile in their shoes. Faith is not that easy when your life depends on it.

When I was led to a place where I truly had to trust God and believe with all my life that it was the right thing for me to lose everything, become penniless, homeless and jobless the first thing I said to Him was “ you mean I have to believe for real?”  I was not trying to be funny or clever. Those words came out of my mouth simply because I came face to face with my idea of faith and God’s idea. My idea of faith consisted of words, experiences, activities, emotions and so on and it was all beautiful as far as I was concerned and also for people observing me. There was no effort, no building up on faith, no trying to do anything that was peculiar, no God to impress, no letting go of my common sense and believe anything mystical about this Christian life.

When I uttered the words “you want me to believe for real?” All of the sudden I realized He was asking me to trust someone that no one has ever seen. He was asking me to believe those words that I have been reading in the Bible which were inspired by an invisible God. He was asking me to believe all those things I have been reading about Salvation and Christ truly died and most of all I had to believe that He truly ascended into heaven.  Yes, by the time He asked me to believe and bet my life on Him, I was experiencing Him and He was so real to me, but that’s not faith either. I found myself asking Him “but, how do I know you are not a figment of my imagination?” The reason we have this “fight and flight” response when God is testing our faith, it is because everything about faith defy logic and when common sense is out of the windows we have nothing else to go on.

When we look at Hebrews 11:6 most of us go through it and do not even think twice about what we are repeating. It was a frightening thing for me to master just this tiny part of the verse which is: “For he that comes to God must believe that he is.”   Do you realize even the demons are ahead of us? They believe so much that they shudder in the presence of Christ. You might think that this is beside the point that I am trying to make in this post. But it is not. The reason is, throughout my walk with God I never lose sight of the fact that even demons shudder in Christ’s presence and they live with great reverence toward God. So, I need to know that my walk goes further than that and the only way it is going to differentiate me from the demons is what I decide to do with my trust in Him and how well I am going to accept His leadership. In that sense, His leadership has to become a reality in my life and yours. I will never be content with an assumption that I am probably being led by Him.

I did not trust God right away and I spent days weighing things and trying to work it all out in my heart. One day, the Holy Spirit knew I was struggling with the idea of banking real life and real consequences with an invisible God that might not be real.” The compassion of the Holy Spirit was out of this world, with so much understanding and tenderness, He said “Jess” look into your heart, don’t try to understand with your mind but think about the changes that you know happened within you. Are these real changes? I had to say yes because few minutes at the feet of God is worth months of learning and changes on the inside. I knew I had become a different person because I had a spiritual relationship with Him. This life was mine and no one could take it away from my heart and I knew for a fact, this inward change and spiritual relationship were not my imagination. So, the Holy Spirit said then hold onto to what you know is true in this relationship and take the next step of faith with Him, this part of you that you cherish so much has been given to you by this invisible God you are doubting right now.  Only then, I knew I could trust Him for the next step.

Notice something, when I was not able to trust Him I did not get busy trying my earnest to bury what was going on in my life, through friends, social media, time spent on the internet or church activities.  I stayed close to Him and continued my Bible and prayer time along with mediation with a heart ready and willing to receive more instructions.  Another thing I found out, God is happy when we trust Him, but He is glorified when we trust right away within thinking twice about what He asks of us. So, He keeps taking us through more testing and as time goes by, we too we can see how fast we react in trusting His leading.  But, even when God is taking us through further testing, I find that sometimes we are totally oblivious to what He is doing until we take our focus off of us and look onto Jesus.

Throughout the years God has never let go and has always been by my side. It turns out, I never had to be on the streets because God had chosen a place for me to go and He prepared this person to receive me. But when you are dealing with a mean drunk who is always looking for the next fight, it is not easy.  While God prepared the heart of this person to give me a place to live, He did not take away his need to blackmail me day in day out. Everyday I lived with a constant reminder that I can be out on the streets.  As anxieties set in, it took me a few weeks to understand that I had no right to panic.

One day I received the usual threats and I was shown the doors, all of the sudden I realized that I have been living with anxieties in my heart instead of trusting God. I remember stopping what I was doing and instead of getting upset or taking the doors like I was told, one verse came to mind and I thought about the lilies of the valleys. Then I told myself, if God takes care of them, I am so much more than a lily to Him. I realized I had an extraordinary opportunity to once again trust His word and have faith in Him. I can smile about it now when I see how much God used this man’s meanness to keep testing my faith in Him until my faith was as strong as an oak tree.

God used this person's character to keep me deeper in my surrendering. There, I found not only there are three levels of surrendering to God but after a while you learn to live a life totally abandoned to Him. (& yes I found out there was a major spiritual difference between living the surrendered life and a life of complete abandonment to His will.)  I personally learned that the life of total abandonment resemble to the life of a branch attached to the tree of life and sucking everything needed to survive and flourish. No, you are not perfect, and you can step out of the abandoned life once in a while but the beauty of living a life totally abandoned to Him, is that you know when you step out of Him, because you are like a fish out of water.

I also learned, the faith that God is looking for has nothing to do with the opportunities we create for ourselves while forging our own footprints. Because, true faith is always about not knowing and not seeing, yet you chose to believe and walk the path however hard and in spite of the consequences. Our faith is directly related to our obedience to God‘s word.  Throughout the Bible faith is never about how well we believed in the past, but how well we pass today’s test of faith, Christianity is a continuous spiritual fight to keep your faith renewed in Him daily.

Brothers and sisters there is nothing glorious about my life, it is actually full of shame and hardships. I poured my heart out to you and shared my shame because if God could use my story to bring your forward and stop a man-made Christian walk, if you can end up in His arms of love, then glory to Him! You and I will not only meet in heaven but we will be right there serving as royalty, by His side.

 In His Agape Love & Service

MJ

Faith - Part 9

  How do we know we are actually living out true faith?

The answer is when we believe everything God said about Himself and everything He said about us. When you can believe that He is indeed everything He said He is, brings you to a place where you can make a total commitment to Him. But the challenge we all face, is getting to that state where the belief that is in the mind is transferred to the heart and into practice into the everyday life. 

A. W. Tozer said: The word “faith” is common these days, but placing one’s faith in God is a weighty action, uncommonly fraught with consequence and, by His design, inconvenience. Faith in God is reassuring and comforting only insofar as believers trust Him—and that depth of trust is the mark of a mature Christian who has allowed faith to intrude on his life and shift his gaze away from his.

  

When I was in the wilderness with God by the time I reached 2007, things have gotten so bad that for a moment I felt God was cruel.  You see, I had my own expectations and understanding and in my mind I was under the impression that God can only push things so far. Let me explain what I mean by that. While this is not biblical to think that God could push things so far, but I came to think this way, by hanging on to certain verses which I understood with the little intellect I have.  I can think of two of those verses right now.  One of them is “ I will never leave you nor forsake you” and the other one is “ for I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  In my mind I thought, for God to take everything away from me was in contradiction to so many verses in the Bible and I could not wrap my brain around it.

Between 2005 up to the beginning of 2007 God kept bringing me to places where I needed to prove to Him that I trusted Him Even though the uncertainty was insurmountable and I could not see where anything was leading, I kept saying yes to God and chose Him over and over again thinking it would be sufficient. (After all, He did not let Abraham sacrifice Isaac)  I had no idea what God was doing, was simply preparing me for the worst that was yet to come.

In my mind, I kept thinking there is no way God would take me deeper because my life would be catastrophic so the alternative was unthinkable.  But, if you follow my thoughts so far, you will notice all throughout my hardship, I was looking at me, my pain, my failure and my losses. Yet, even though I was wrong all the way and Salvation was still about me, I had no idea I was failing Him miserably. I honestly felt that I proved myself to God when it came to my faith in Him and as far as I was concerned He should have been satisfied. After all, when it truly mattered and He put me to the test, I chose Him.

To make a long story short, when time was of the essence and I needed God to come to my rescue and end the waiting process, He told me it was time to come to terms with the worst case scenario. Then He showed me His worst case scenario would be me being homeless on the streets and alone. Well, I answered Him by lashing out to Him and I told Him He did not honor His word. After I hashed it out with God, I learned to trust Him and that He had a plan for me even if I could not understand the reason behind it all, it was not my place to doubt Him.  Even though I was scared, confused and in pain because the life that I knew was disintegrating before my eyes and I could not do anything to salvage it, I actually accepted my fate.  With uncontrollable tears and intense pain I went to Him and said “May your will be done regardless what I expect or desire.” When I finished, I asked Him to watch over me and I would appreciate it if He could show me which street is better. I prayed that He would sustain me through the pain, all the losses and the shame.

Later on, God showed when I accepted the worst case scenario that was the moment I showed true faith in Him.  He showed me the difference between the first few months when I chose Him but I made the outcome and everything else about what He was putting me through, about me. Even though I was still a babe in the faith, I found there was a world of a difference in my heart.  There was humility in my heart, I had a heart focussed more on living upon Him, I was persuaded of His right to my life and I surrendered to the truth of the word of God.

Amazingly, as soon as I made the decision to trust Him, He showed me how us Christians misunderstand and misused verses of the Bible most of the time because we understand them with our intellect. I also stopped thinking that God owed me anything. He also taught me why most Christians do not have faith but they are not aware of it. It was something out of this world how He opened up my heart to learn spiritual truths. But most of what He taught me during that time was about the state of Christianity out there and why I needed to be set apart.

Well, since He was so happy with me and He was teaching me so much, I again assumed that He was not going to go through with His plan for me to be out there on the streets.  Not only I was wrong, He did go through the worst case scenario with me.  Furthermore, I found out soon after, the loss of everything and being homeless was just the beginning of what was going to become my life.

When I first lost everything there was nothing left except perhaps my life for Him to take, I did not even have time to mourn my losses because God was busy putting me through the brokenness process, then it was a time of regeneration, the next that followed was declaring me holy. It all happened in that order. During that time, I was so shattered into millions of pieces on the inside I felt like a shadow of myself.  At times I wish I could get an epidural to endure the pain of the impartation process. There were times, I wish I could sleep while God did the work in me. But, this is not how God works. I am now in my eighth years and the waiting process is still in full fledge.

All this happened because I felt called by Him to draw closer. When I obeyed the call, I had no idea this was going to be a life long of testing faith.

The rest of this story is for another post.