Today I was reading Oswald Chambers and I went through a self-examination
that caused me to be not satisfied with what I found about me at all. I kept
pondering “Why is it I cannot get Matthew 6:25 right”? Suffice to say that the
conclusion I reached about myself toward God, is not good. I was hard on myself
because I felt, by now I should get this main point right and there must be some
kind of stubbornness in my heart that causes me to fail God over and over
again.
The Holy Spirit showed me that there is a depth in this
passage that has escaped me. He allowed me to see with the eyes of my heart,
certain things about me and how I have been working them out steadfastly with
Him. Then the Spirit of God showed me why there will always be room to teach me
this passage of Matthew 6:25, unless I had an opportunity to walk with Him for
hundreds of years before my death. He said, try to see this passage as if you were
going to school and your intent is to reach the highest level you can achieve
in your education. It dawned on me, let’s assume you live in the United States,
then, there is one subject that always follows you and you are always improving
on, and this subject is English. The same goes for someone who is from Quebec
or France, the subject that constantly followed them is French. Then, I
understood that I am not that bad. What is true here is that, yes, I am failing
Him, but because I am walking with Him, He is constantly teaching me and most
of all, REFINING me. Please note, when I
thought I was bad, it was not because Satan forced me to think this about
myself, but because of what I know of His word and because of my relationship
with Him. I thought, I serve a God who deserves better.
Satan will have the opportunity to use our thinking process against
us, when we are not open to God’s teachings. When we insist on living in our
ignorance and when our minds are made up about what we want and what we know.
As long as our motives and attitude are right with God, then God will NEVER
allow Satan to use our examination of the self to his advantage and lead us
away or cause us to live in guilt. We should not dread the process of self-examination
as if Satan will have the last word. Satan will have as much power on us as we
give him. Two years in the wilderness with Him, He showed me how He had become
my tower of refuge. It was then I learned to see Satan for who he is and his
lack of power on Christians. The difference is found in whether we are living
IN HIM (Paul’s words “if indeed you are in Christ” came alive to me.) There is
a process there and if I were to share the vision, it, would make this post way
too long. But, God needed to teach me the difference between Satan’s power on a
true Christian and the ones who are living in accordance with the world. This
was such a beautiful moment with Christ when I found out, “IN HIM” we have
shelter and the only way Satan can touch us is that he would have to go through
Christ, literally.
